Went out clubbing yesterday to the venue in New Cross with a couple of friends was a really good night, cant remember alot of it i was so drunk, but I got this girls number and im going to call it later we got on really well and I stayed to leaving time with her as my friends went home early. Shes from lithuania and seems okay, gonna try not to mess this up like I have done loads of times this year but hey at least I try.Woke up with a really bad hang over and a serious bout of depression, my old friend the suicidal thoughts came back and were tellin me what a loser i am and im not caperbel as other people and that i should end things now as im never going to be the person i want or like to be. But knew these thoughts would pass was just very uncomfatable and nightmarish. listened to an anthony robbins tape and it made me feel alot more optamistic and before those thoughts would have been overwelming but now i have got some sort of plan of what i want to do in the near future it gives me something to focus on thus making me feel abit better. 

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

That sounds Great..... you ARE making some great progress, I am so proud. Now if only I could get to your point!!
deleted_user
deleted_user

I\'m very happy for you I wish I could feel like the feelings would pass but I\'m so glad you are getting better sweetheart!
deleted_user
deleted_user

Hello. Im sorry I am late replying to your journal. I went away to VT all weekend! Had a great time, but will never catch up completely on journals!! YES I WILL! Im glad you met a nice girl. I feel like ringing your neck!!! You need to be nicer to yourself! WHY wouldn\'t u be deserving? Of course you are. And if things dont work out, it isnt YOUR FAULT! It takes 2! So dont blame yourself. The most attractive part of any man or woman is self confidence! So act like you are very self confident. People will feel that and look up to you. If you appear to have a low self esteem, people sense it and run away!!! So carry yourself with pride and dignity!!! And a handsome smile.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Hello. Im sorry I am late replying to your journal. I went away to VT all weekend! Had a great time, but will never catch up completely on journals!! YES I WILL! Im glad you met a nice girl. I feel like ringing your neck!!! You need to be nicer to yourself! WHY wouldn\'t u be deserving? Of course you are. And if things dont work out, it isnt YOUR FAULT! It takes 2! So dont blame yourself. The most attractive part of any man or woman is self confidence! So act like you are very self confident. People will feel that and look up to you. If you appear to have a low self esteem, people sense it and run away!!! So carry yourself with pride and dignity!!! And a handsome smile.
deleted_user
deleted_user

you are a wonderful person, never give up, keep pressing on