10/8/2010 - this is what he said...
My boyfriend is in China and several nights ago, when we were video chatting, I cried when I told him I picked up the tox report on Andy. He was upset for I was hurting and asked "knowing no matter what the tox report said, you would be upset, then why pursue that?" I cried and I told him I needed to terminate the conversation temporarily and got back to him in 15 mins. I was going to recollect myself. Then 15 mins later, he was gone. Next I found out he went for a walk.
He loves me and when I hurt, he hurts. I did tell him how to comfort me, just be there, hugs etc. I don't know, perhaps I should let this go for I do not want to burden or ruin others' emotion.
Today I got this email... and please comment....
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I do not know if I have the ability to deal with it; there is no way for me to ever understand; there is no way for me to ever provide you with comfort; there is nothing that I can do but watch you be sad... I like to at least be able to try to fix things but this is so far out of my reach... there is simply nothing that I can do...
There is nothing that I can bring to you. No emotional, physical or financial support of any kind... I just add to your burden and it is all ready a very heavy load.
He loves me and when I hurt, he hurts. I did tell him how to comfort me, just be there, hugs etc. I don't know, perhaps I should let this go for I do not want to burden or ruin others' emotion.
Today I got this email... and please comment....
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I do not know if I have the ability to deal with it; there is no way for me to ever understand; there is no way for me to ever provide you with comfort; there is nothing that I can do but watch you be sad... I like to at least be able to try to fix things but this is so far out of my reach... there is simply nothing that I can do...
There is nothing that I can bring to you. No emotional, physical or financial support of any kind... I just add to your burden and it is all ready a very heavy load.
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