1-15-15

Today is the day...I will have to see his stinking face, and sit with him to file our divorce.  After all his lies, his false promises of wanting to work on our marriage, making me feel that I had done something to destroy our marriage.  Only to find out that he had strayed from the marriage...that his guilt was causing him to take things out on me and our son. 
I feel sick and just a rush with emotions I have never experienced.  I feel humiliated, embarrassed, and disrespected.  It is so hard not to verbally lash out, I have to be strong today (and forever).  I've seen some people post about "taking back your power".  I want to be that person, I want strength and power to move forward and put what he's done to our family behind me.  I want to be strong for my son, but I just feel like a complete mess...out of control. 
How can I pull it together?