Young Widows Community Group

This is a group for people who lost there partners at a young age. Come here for support and to offer encouragement to other people who have lost their partners.

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Getting past the estate business long enough to gr

laurasimpson
laurasimpson
Hi I'm new to this website.. My husband died 17 months ago. I have spent so much time working to pay bills and dealing with estate matters ( dealing with creditors, phone calls, emails, faxes, lawyers, trustees, realtors, etc) I haven't had time to grieve the loss of my husband as yet.. this past 17 months has been a nightmare from which i cannot wake up.. I feel as though i have gone through a horrible divorce and have lost everything..... only thing is it's NOT a divorce, he died... His family have been terrible so I have distanced myself from them. With all that has happened - how do you stop yourself from feeling like you're going crazy?? Sometimes I have to stop and take a breath... Anyone else have some many legalities to deal with that it gets in the way of your grief and your everyday life? so beyond tired and so hope for peace someday
lostheloveofmylife
lostheloveofmylife
Hello, first thing I am sorry for ur loss. I have been dealing with probate and my late hubbys children . It does become over wheleming at times. I just keep pushing forward and really it is so much better when u r around positive ppl. My late hubby has been gone for almost 3 yrs. It's hard but I have a boyfriend that is a big support and so is my daughter. Just keep breathing and pray to God and he will provide for u ..
laurasimpson
laurasimpson
Thank you for your response.. sometimes i feel so alone... noone knows how hard this has been.. they think when the funeral is over, everything else is too. So many things people have taken for granted - they don't understand what chaos has come from not having a will. I got my will done up last January- if anything happens to me - I never want anyone to go through what I have. I just want peace. All I do is work and take care of the kids.. there is no time for much else.... Although I am taking time from work right now to start a bit of this healing process. thanks for listening
erinbutterfly81
erinbutterfly81
Laura,
I am glad I read your post. I have been through a similar ordeal. My fiancée and I have 2 small children together and they were 1 and 3 when he died. We had plans to be married but never made it to the wedding day. His family was awful to me. and because we weren't married they got to make all the decisions while he was dying in the hospital and refused to let him be buried in California where we live. to this day my children and I have never seen his grave. I had to hire lawyers to fight them in probate court which was an utter nightmare. it has been 2 years now and I have paid 14 thousand dollars in lawyer fees for probate court to handle my kids estate. They fought me every step of the way. It is absolutely heart breaking to know that they have so little respect for me as his fiancée. Not to mention his mother got over 160K in death benefit money and promptly changed her number after. It has made it very hard to grieve. Things eventually get easier but I still have my emotional days. Good luck to you and I know what you mean about having your things in order before you die. regardless of age. I would never want my kids or family to go through this if I died.

Erin