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I man in my life. His name is Wes. I've known him for three or four years and we've been on and off dating. He is so sweet. He knows about everything I've been through and has been there for me through it all. Even when i was in other relationships he was there for me and told me he was going to wait for me because he loved me. He is enrolled in the army and is going through basic training right now so I can't talk to him at all and it stinks! :( I got a notebook and write to him in it every night and when he comes here to see me after basic I'm going to give it to him! I'm so excited to see him when he gets out! I've got 9 more weeks until then though.. He makes me so happy though. Just thinking of him puts a huge smile on my face. He is so amazing! He calls me at night and stays on the phone with me until I fall asleep. He boosts my self esteem too. He tells me all the time how beautiful he thinks I am and stuff. I love how he puts me up on a pedestal. He talks about our future all of the time too. He says he can't wait until we're married and have children. I love the thought of that but part of me is worried. I don't know how tied down I want to get right now while I'm in college. I want to finish college before I have kids. Part of me even wants to casually date for a little bit just so I can be sure he's the one. I don't know.. I don't want to tell him about the dating around thing because I know it would break his heart. He has been waiting for me for a very long time and finally has me. I love having the stable commitment in my life and don't want to let it go but.. at the same time I want something more... If that makes any sense at all.. Any advise? Is there anything you think that I should or shouldn't do?
deleted_user
Have you at least told him that you don't want to be tied down with kids right now? All my friends who married guys in the army got married really young and subsequently most got divorced really young. I think you are right to question being tied down. He does seem like a great guy and you definitely don't find those every day, You said he comes in in 9 more weeks (well less now). Have you tried just casually meeting men and seeing what you think? Not dating them. Just meeting them. You can usually tell a lot from the first meeting with someone. You seem like an intelligent girl who could tell if someone was putting on an act or not. Let us know how it turns out. My husband is one of the "good guys" who always believed that good guys finished last until he met me. At least give Army guy a chance when he gets in but if he wants a truly honest relationship with you then it will be good to share your fears with him.
IsabellaF
Okay, take it from someone who up and decided to get married very young, with all of those same thoughts ( wanting to establish myself, wanting to date around, wanting something more), if you're not ready, don't push yourself. I promise you if you do, you'll end up regretting it, or resenting him later on. If he's been willing to wait all of this time, then there's no reason why he can't wait until you are absolutely ready. There's a reason why you feel like you might want something else...there's a reason for everything. Love is tricky, but relationships can turn it from tricky to something unbelievable ( and that can be in a good or bad way). Tell him the truth about how you feel, and maybe he'll understand.....This is what I always remind myself: we've got nothing but time, until the day we die. Don't waste any of it, wondering coulda, woulda, shoulda.
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