I stopped posting on this board quite awhile ago after being the moderator for a few years.  Not because I didnt love being here but

I was finding alot of people I referred here were having trouble accessing the board.  My plan was to create my own board and yes I did all the preliminary work to do it.  It is my desire at some point to do more than a board like this but rather a spirtual board of hope.  God will let me know if and when that is to happen.  I will touch base here regularly and see if God continues to guide people here that needs it.  When I agreed to be moderator on this board I went in with the hope of making a difference in 1 persons life and that continues to be my attitude.  Of course a board is not about the moderator but the community of people involved with it.  I invite old friends and new to post and share here.  For the old friends they can share there accomplishments and journey through grief and for new friends in the early stages of grief hopefully this will be a soft place to land and vent.  Obviously covid her presented a unique set of challenges in the grief process which is one of many reasons I thought it was time to come back.  

  For those that dont know my story I lost my wife Pablita in 2013.  The next 2 years were hell on earth for me emotionally.  I reached out to this board for help and it got me through some of my darkest periods.  Angels that were here at the time included. jewels, Sharon, and many others.  Over the years that followed I retired early, married off my only dgt.  moved across the country and back, sold a house, developed a new network of friends, and became more actively involved in several church communities.  I have not entered into a new relationship but if God allows the right person in my life  I am now open to it(I wasnt for many years).  Grief stripped me of hope.  Through God not only do I have hope again but have found peace and my relationship with God becomes richer by the day.  

  I will check in, and share my insights moving forward.  I often told my dear friend Jewells gried was like being in a dark tunnel and it took alot of emotional and spiritual hard word to find the light at the end of it.  For those of you beginning the road yes I wanted to die because I was in so much pain.  I promise you that you will never forget but you will learn to rebuild and move forward.  God bless.  Gerry