Hi Martiki. I still check this site daily and am dismayed that it has "petered out" as you say. I keep hoping that it will become active once again.

Well you and I can chit chat back and forth at least and maybe others will join in.

I see you are in AZ. I'm in MA and we're having a snow storm right now. I've got supplies in and no where to go for the weekend, so let it snow.

Take care of yourself!
Marti

Oh I remember being "snowed in" very well Marti. I spent the first 48 years of my life in SD!! I live in the central part of AZ at an elevation of 4800 feet. Not as cold here as in Flagstaff and not as hot as Phoenix. Kind of "in-between". Love it! We have had more snow this year than usual due to El Nino. I truly hate snow, but if one has to have it, at least isn't so bad here. It usually melts in a day or two due to the intensity of the sun at this elevation. We are going to be in the 60's for the next week and that is perfect. In fact I am considering planting some radishes and lettuce today. I know, I know, I'm probably jumping the gun, but what can I say? A true gardener at heart!! LOL

Darlene

Wow the idea of planting anything in February is foreign to me. I'm in the town of Eastham on Cape Cod. "The sun and fun capital of the east coast!" my husband used to say (especially during weather like this).
I was born in New Hampshire, but move to Cape Cod when I was 5 and somehow have been "stuck" here ever since. So I'm well acquainted with snow and harsh winters.

I really can't stand to be too hot, so I don't think I'd do well in AZ. But it's all in what you are used to, so you need to "bloom where you are planted" I guess.

Still piling up out there...
Marti

Well I did it!!! Foolish as it may be, I planted some radishes, lettuce and a few kohl rabi. It may very well be too early, but last year I was eating radishes in March so we will see. Farming/gardening is a big gamble but I love it! In fact I find the outdoors to be very healing for me. Whenever I get to feeling sad and/or depressed, I go outdoors. It truly seems to help.

Stay warm and safe.
Darlene

Hi you all, sorry I've been away. I guess you could call it a Super Bowl holiday. I have relatives in Boston and Baltimore so I've been keeping an eye on the weather in the northeast. But over here by the Super Bowl, it's been nice and warm.

Hi Guys, it's 90 degrees here in L.A. Too warm for this time of year. We actually started the year with some real weather and then, well, it got too much for us and we're back to the same old!!

This thread promised to be great when Dana and Dewey started it and then it kind of died like the rest of our lives!

Marti, I too don't like to be preached to. Not that I don't believe that everyone has the right to their own beliefs and should feel free to express themselves. It's just when the conversations became overly preachy that I tend to get turned off! I don't like when God is brought into the discussion and what's happened or happening in our lives. I like to keep politics and religion out of expressing my grief and or my feelings.

On that note, I'll briefly introduce myself: My husband, Morey, passed away on April 11, 2013 from what the doctors thought was a spinal cord stroke. He collapsed to the floor at home, was not unconscience but lost the ability to stand and walk. He fell on March 25th and never walked again. He was hospitalized, put into re-hab which did absolutely nothing for him, put into cardiac care and then left to vegetate.

Personally, I think he was misdiagnosed and much time was wasted by the wrong doctors. It was a nightmare. Of course, it didn't help that he was completely uncooperative. He just wanted me to take him home,I couldn't lift him or I would have. He was 74 years old, and I miss him every minute of every day!

I still work a full-time job. I've been on the job for 19 years and don't plan on quitting until I can't walk anymore. I love what my job buys for me and staying home would bore me to death. My job gives me 4 weeks a year and I love to travel and have started to do it again as a solo or with friends and family.

I have 3 children and 7 Grandchildren. I have a 95lb Lab/Golden Retriever who keeps me company and who totally understands me.

Roz ♥

Hey Roz. I too would like to do some traveling but just hate to put my dogs into a kennel. What do you do with your dog during your travels?

Thanks for the introduction Roz. I'm sorry you lost your Morey.

There was some misdiagnosis with my Ken too. I took him to the ER very late at night/morning of Tues June 4th. He had horrible excruciating pain in his left shoulder radiating down his arm and into his chest. It would be unbearably intense for a few minutes and then go away completely. After several hours at the ER and all manner of tests they released him with a dx of peripheral neuropathy. They gave him muscle relaxers and pain meds and told him to follow up with his regular doc. He did - he saw his doctor on Wednesday, but his doctor didn't know what to make of it either. He just gave him new prescriptions for the same meds. The pain episodes came farther and farther apart and on Friday he felt well enough to work. I drove him there and that was the last time I saw him alive. That afternoon he collapsed. His heart went into V Fib and stopped beating. EMTs got a pulse going and rushed him to the hospital, but he died without ever regaining consciousness. It was June 7, 2013 - just 3 days after the ER visit. His death certificate says "coronary artery disease - duration =years".... He was in generally good health. He hadn't been diagnosed with any conditions. His cholesterol wasn't high. His blood pressure was on the low side. He was just a little overweight. He smoked a pipe. But he had a strong family history of heart disease and he had a heart murmur. His dad died of a heart attack at 56. His grandfather died of one at 62. His younger brother survived a heart attack in his early 40s. With the smoking, the heart murmur, and that kind of history either the ER doc or his regular doctor should have sent him for a full cardiac work up.
He was only 59.
I'm 2 years older than him. I'm very overweight. I have high blood pressure, high cholesterol and diabetes. I've been working at all of these risk factors and have made some great strides toward improvement in all - but still - of the two of us I should have been the one to have a heart attack. You just don't know. You can't go by anything. You just have to take each day as it comes and be grateful for all that you do have while you have it.
As much as a horrible shock it was to lose him so sudden and unexpectedly, I'm grateful that he went like he did. He likely didn't feel any pain or know what was happening - at least I hope he didn't. The loss of blood to his brain made him pass out . I'm glad it was this way instead of any long lingering suffering.

I miss him terribly. We had 21 years together and we were each other's everything.

We didn't have any children. I have one son by a previous relationship. He's 45 and has spent the last 21 years in prison. He has a life sentence. The chances for grandchildren are pretty much nil.

So it's just me and my kitty, Towanda. She just had her 18th birthday. I can't think about how many more days I'll have her. I just focus on the fact that she's here with me right now. That's the way we have to be about everybody and everything. It's all temporary.

Marti <3

hgs, My dog Horton is a Service Dog and goes EVERYWHERE I go. He's laying in his bed at work with me right now. He's been on 9 cruises and will be on his 10th in November. My last Service Dog had finished 15 cruises [most of which were with Morey and I] before she passed 10 months after Morey passed.

Although, we did lots of different kinds of travel before Morey passed, we really liked cruising the best. You get to wake up in a different city or country every day and you never have to leave your bedroom. You pack and unpack once. it's so much fun and everything is included. Love it.

Roz ♥

Marti, your experience with your husband's illness was truly a nightmare for you. I know the feeling of frustration that you both must have felt. There's nothing we can do to bring them back. Hopefully, we'll NEVER have to know from such nightmare's every again!!!!

Your kitty Towanda will be company for you. I don't know what I would have done if it weren't for my amazingly wonderful dogs. Brenda is gone now but I still have Horton who is my very dearest and best friend!

I have a big family and lots of friends but no one understands me like Horton!!!!

I'm still working a full-time job and being in my 60's with an office filled with 20 and 30 something's can be a bit daunting. I try and ignore them as much as I can. I don't play the roll of their Mother and expect that they treat me on the same level as them [but, with more respect!] I've been here for 19 years and don't expect to quit until I say so!!!!

Roz ♥

I just found this sight I only been a widow since dec 4 2015 ... It's really a mightmare was married 39 years ... Sorry if I interrupt didn't know how to get started I not a computer person

Hi Jennie, it's a miserable club to belong to, I must say. The best part is meeting some truly wonderful folks who understand totally what it's all about and how that missing our mates can consume us in ways that we definitely want to know about.

Everyone goes through the grieving process differently. For me, it's been 2 1/2 years, it's complicated. I don't feel lonely without Morey, and I'm not afraid to be alone......The loss is NOT having someone who loves me more than anything else in this life anymore. It's so joyful to be loved by someone else, in that very special way. To know that someone has your back, unselfishly. To lose that kind of life is so monumental.

I had a great love.....I'll always be grateful for that.

Roz ♥

Hello Jennie - I'm sorry for your loss. That is very recent. I'm sure you must still feel like it is a nightmare. 39 years is a long time.

You aren't interrupting at all It's kind of difficult to figure out how to start a new topic here. This is a nice site and there are lots of lovely people here, but it's not especially "user friendly".

Roz - I know what you mean. It's about the same length of time for me. I don't ever feel lonely either and I'm not afraid to be alone. But I was the center of Ken's world and he was the center of mine. We had a beautiful and strong relationship - a "you and me against the world" kind of thing and I really was loved and cherished and protected. And now I've lost that sense of protection - the knowledge that no matter what - I have someone on my side.

I guess it will have to be enough to remember that I had all of that and that if I was that well loved by someone as kind and noble as Ken was... well then I must really be worthy.

I'm so very grateful. I know that what I had was so rare.

Marti

Marti, we truly were the lucky one's weren't we! I sometimes think about having someone again in my life but that feeling passes pretty quickly. There's still so much that I have to do to make my home mine. I still have closets with Morey's stuff in them. I did give away lots and lots of his stuff and still I have a lot more.

I can't empty everything out that would mean that he really is gone.......I know, sounds so stupid, but I sometimes think he'll come walking in the front door and tell me that he's been on a fishing trip or looking for property in another state. I know he's gone but to just hold him one more time, to see his sparkling blue eyes and dimples just one more time!!!

Our children lost their father and are missing him so much. He was our rock! Our son is imploding. He's acting differently and is becoming estranged. Everyone says it's his protection, I think he's acting like an ass and needs to come to his senses before he looses me and I won't be there to tell him, "it's okay, you'll be okay!"

It's amazing how dependent we become on each other's words to pull us through.

Take care,
Roz ♥