I hope that people will be receptive to my doing my first step here at this site. I just got done doing an online meeting and listening to three podcasts and now feel properly ready to take step one. Luckily the third podcast was a live O.A. meeting and they were discussing step one. What is really key for me about step one is the idea that admitting powerlessness is NOT the same thing as admitting weakness. Admitting powerlessness, rather, puts me in a place where we can receive the power that we need when we move on to step two. So I am not going to talk about being powerless as being a negative thing. Rather it's a freedom to be able to say that I really and truly can't do this by myself. And I can't manage my life with my own unaided will. And by admitting that I am powerless I can then realize that I can't control my eating nor can I control my life. And I admit that every time I go to the fridge looking to binge, I am acting like I can control it when I can't. How many time have I said that this time I will control it and it won't be that bad? That's my denial of this addiction talking. So now that I can be free to admit powerlessness and know that I need to take step one daily, I can then open my mind and heart to the help that I need from my higher power and from this group.

thanks for reading my first step!

Heidi