He absolutely has NOT changed. I can promise that. I've been with 2 psychopaths, 1 narcissist, and another PD'ed man and I've heard directly from prior gfs/wives of them and it's ALWAYS the same story. We all have exactly the same complaints. We fall for their BS in the beginning. Give them too many chances. And eventually get fed up. They lie and twist everything around to play the victim. But if you talk to the exes, you'll get the real story, and it will sound remarkably similar to yours.

it means a lot to hear this,I've tortured myself with all of these images of their perfect life.I know my fault for looking at her profile but I was shocked at how settled they looked together how fast the relationship looked to move. They have been together a year and she is boasting about their wonderful life. Beautiful house and great life.

I am on my knees bringing up two kids and the bad person in all of it because he paints me as the nasty person. Not a penny in child support over these years, he made promises at first but nothing materialised once he knew he couldn't manipulate me. He never had much interest in our kids and ignored them alot of the time, every photo of him with this woman's son hurts me because he is going to parent evenings and taking them on trips I wanted to go on.

I'm holding on to the truth that he is a sociopath and like you say his mask will slip.maybe he will keep this facade up a while longer but eventually he will surely show his real self,I know it was only when we had the kids together that he showed his evil self but i saw hints of it earlier. Can't stop dreaming about this stuff I feel like I should be over it but it feels like yesterday it all happened.

Dear whitehorse, I understand why from time to time you would question your gut. From one side you know how he is TRULY; yet one the other side his current facade of happiness triggers thoughts that you were the wrong person for him and he eventually found his soulmate. You might think that he has settled with another person, just not you (and so you devaluate yourself while having these ideas torturing you). Well, you should pity his new prey. And you should be proud of yourself that you managed to run away from such an evil monster. I have just ended my 6 years relationship with the man I deeply loved and with whom I thought I was in the best relationship ever, the father of my two kids of 3 and 4. When I first met him, 6 years ago, he deceived me into believing that he was separated, but in fact he was living with his partner and mother of his first child. After I was pregnant with him, he told this poor lady about it and she was crashed. Then he told me about his lies, and I put up with it all believing his words of having lived a hell of a relationship with his ex. He told me he found in me anything he was looking for, and that he loved me deeply and that we had such a special connection that he never experienced before. Now I know these were lies. He made efforts to look like a good guy and a good father, and having a 'family' with me, and displaying his family to the world was exactly what he needed to appear like a good guy after he destroyed his previous family in such a horrible way. He found that having another family with other children would help him appearing like a loving father and a good partner. He basically tried to convince everyone that his previous relationship was a mistake because that lady DID NOT LOVE HIM THE WAY HE DESERVED. With such an aim in mind he played with my life and the lives of our two little kids. He built a new family and would tell everybody how serene and happy he finally was, after the nightmare with his ex had ended. He wanted to hide his extremely deviant and evil behavior, which of course has been consistently there.
I guess that this is what your ex is trying to achieve now. He wants to save his face. That's it. The mask will slip again. No doubt about it.

Whitehorse they are masters of facade. My ex did the exact same thing. In fact 4 months after our relationship ended (the first 3 months he bombarded me daily with texts messages of saying how much he loved and missed me) he found a new victim and within 3 months of meeting her online he had traveled to meet her in person and tried to marry her then and there. That didn't work out upon their first meeting but he spent another 6 months charming her online and then married her. He immediately got her pregnant (I assume by the date the child was born this happened the same night they were married) and now have a child together and yet they STILL live in different countries with him promising her he will bring her to be with him soon. Their pictures all show happy happy happy online but I know the truth and I know what this poor woman is going through. I tried to warn her but my warnings fell on deaf ears (definitely a lesson in futility). The pictures don't fool me in the least. Don't let your exes pictures fool you either. They love when others (especially exes) think they have moved on and are now the happiest person on the face of the earth without you. But the truth is they are fooling someone else and making someone else miserable with their games and abuse. You are the lucky one to have gotten away. She's tied to him for however long until she either figures it out herself and discards him, or he discards her. Either way it's not a happy picture for her.

thank you,so many similarities in our situations and in our exes behaviour it's like these guys read a book and all follow it.I see that they need to make their new relationships look 'perfect' to hide what is really happening underneath the surface and i remember the abuse in my relationship with him was slow and crept up on me over the years. only when i got pregnant with me first child did he properly drop his mask so maybe there is a long way to go for this new woman.

i admire all women who come out of these relationships, we are strong to be moving on with our lives because they destroy souls and hearts.i don't know if I'll ever be the same again, i find it so hard to trust people now and have little support with my kids. it's hard but it would be way harder if i was still living with my ex so there is that to be grateful for.

The issue is that whatever comes out of their mouth, is a lie. Only after three months from his 'discard in disguise' I have learned SOME of the truth. He always fooled me into believing he loved me, and in the meanwhile he would not just have sex at whatever occasion with exes or new one night prays, but also would reach out for new prays by regularly posting announcements on websites specialized in sadomasochism. He is constantly looking for 'slaves'. Even now, while I am writing, he would from one side claim to me that he loves me and he wants to stay with me, and on the other side he is arranging appointments (in OUR HOUSE) with his latest 20something year old new 'slave' that had answered his post one month ago. I can't believe i had two children with such a perverse evil mind, and I can't accept that I felt the most blessed creature on earth to have a man like that, who I loved deeply. It is not easy to accept the truth. And we certainly have been quite unlucky to fall in such a deadly trap. But at least, since we are here on this website, there is evidence that we do want to survive, and we do want to have the life we deserve. So, Whiterose, I guess we just have to live one day after the other. Sooner or later we will feel better.