Spark - Your experience is making me rethink pursuing him for money lent to him. I brought this up in another thread. As much as I would love and could use the thousands of dollars lent to him (not including all the purchases like you said), it's already gone, and I don't want to go through the agony. But I agree, it's hard to argue your side, when they rip you apart and make them look like the victim. Boo!

I can attest that it does suck to take these guys to court, they are professional liars and usually very good at navigating the legal system. My cases have never ended in justice but they've all been in a very corrupt city known for sympathizing with criminals and punishing victims. However, I can say that my psychopaths were all sued successfully in other courts, by other victims. They were able to garnish wages. So if your psychopath has a job, and you have proof that they owe you, go for it.

Just found out yesterday that I should have been able to sue for attorney fees, yet me attorney said we have to pay our own. I'm afraid to open the mailbox everyday, just because I don't want to receive that court decision. I would expect my lawyer to give me a call when it comes, but doesn't seem to be the case lately. Definitely drives you towards great depression when you receive these things after hours on a Friday, and you can't call your lawyer. The law just plain sucks, and I'm hoping to find a way to change this. Like I said, I'd rather go to jail than give this man one more dime of my savings.

They seem to have a knack of being able to get away with things, they evade responsibility and justice. They don't play by anyone's rules even the law the police . . . authority means nothing to them. They created their own world, they are the king of that world and the rules can be made and broken when and as. It is soul destroying and heartbreaking. I commend you for the strength of spirit to try to get justice served, I don't know much about your situation but I hope it goes in your favour.

People still say to me that I should persue my ex for child support. The reason I didn't in the first place was because it would give him opportunity for contact with me and my daughter and he is dangerous. It's hard explaining to people though why it's pointless taking someone like him to court, my ex is self employed but evaded tax and national insurance for over nine years. Not filed a tax return. He is under the radar. He has made it impossible pretty much for him to be traced or any attachment of earnings put on him.

Sorry to digress. The moral of the tale is that these people don't operate by normal rules ! It takes a lot of strength and courage to fight them. Good on you.

And the lies . . .

They will say ANYTHING to get out of a sticky situation.Smearing, gaslighting, rewriting history . . ANYTHING. It's sick beyond all sickness. They have an uncanny ability to twist anything. Any argument or conversation with them is toxic.

My dad was like that, he would go to any lengths to win an argument. I often thought that disagreeing with him on something was like stepping into a tar pit. He would just go on and on until you backed off and let him be "right".

Everyone who dealt with him learned not to rile him up, it was easier to let him have his way than to endure the torrent of abuse.

Sorry to hear you are going through this. I have been there and it is never ending for me. I have been in and out of courts, only to be made out to be the bad one. Despite the overwhelming physical evidence, which was then somehow twisted to look like it was me instead, the judge sided with the socio/psychopath. It was a farce. There is still a case that could be pursued and overwhelming evidence again that could mean jail time. It has been years. I just dont know if I have the strength to reopen everything. Although it seems to be doing that on its own.
I still have nightmares and feel like I am in the courtroom all over again at the thought. I wonder how a system supposedly there to protect the harmed, can be used so viciously against the very ones it was meant to protect.
Does anyone out there think it would be worth it? Any thoughts? I want this all to end. Fear it will not whether I pursue or not.

i am trying to get a RO against a ASPD but he beat me to it! you all know the stalking using the courts well he is text book, even defending himself just to let me hear his lies, with entourage of his female dupes in tow...what a comical and pathetic circus- even his irresponsible and duped "therapist"- who, I will get her lisc to practice yanked BTW. I am now fighting for my life, have had threats on my life, he has threatened to kill others as well. he has killed small animals, sliced up others, he has a BPD sis and a NP dad who all are joining up and sharing skills, manufacturing evidence. I am now on full NC. but will defend my life, my home and my reputation, my animals. I will not ever back down. they have nothing to loose, all slackers abusers. Both men seem to strangle and rape their females, then harass when the victim tries to report it.
All law enforcement got their number....all just waiting to put them all back into handcuffs.
This idea that any amount of therapy, medication or mediation will work on these disordered people is the most ridiculous farce ever.
In court, facts from sources like banks, actual medical doctors not dumb social workers et all is the only tools. Lies and hearsay stuff is not going to work. One of these people got a dupe to call cops saying I was at his house- truth he was on his way to mine in the middle of the night! Cops gave him a ride home. I am doing everything I can to keep firearms out of the hands of people who have long history of threats, abuse and threatening to kill people including me.
You can win if you have evidence. . Always tell the truth. I have successfully beaten them each of them. NP I got total custody, and NC- lasted 25 years ( in retrospect since they turned out exactly like him anyway should have just left them) Beat the BPD and got that one sent to Juvinile institution. THE ASPD has been in and out of Jail/Mental hospitals et all. Hare checklist they score 30/30. Drugs/alcohol and just having target fixation seems to be their undoing. I ripped the mask off them all! All they are is lies. face them in court with irrefutable proof- and poof they will loose, then slap them back with malicious abuse charges for filing in the first place. courts do not appreciate bogus lawsuits.