Victims of Psychopaths Community Group

Is he or she a sociopath or psychopath? Think we're only talking about serial killers here? Psychopaths, sociopaths and even narcissists come in every walk of life, every career level, and every socio-economic category.

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halfaheartremains 09/04/2012

When confronted with knowledge of their personality disorder did they just shrug it off? Do they admit it, or just blame others for their own faults?

I told him that I knew what he was a Sociopath about 2 weeks after our break- up ( which was really a D&D). He did not bat an eye, and just went on to say that my Dad is also one because he is a successful person, and that he hurt people to get there. That is completely untrue about my Dad, he did not hurt people to get ahead.

Then he said, "maybe I am one, but your codependent and that is what caused all our problems". He can't make up his mind on what to blame it on, but it is never himself. Not true about me either.

These are just more examples of him blaming me, my family, my job, my child, my house for being the reason that he had "no choice" but to abandon me.

snowy22315 09/04/2012

He did not say anything, in the past he has denied being a narcisscist or sociopath, but I think he knows essentially it is true. He admitted to me freely at one time he was "not a nice person" and that he had
"no conscience." He also told him other people have said that about him.

deleted_user 09/04/2012

Mine mentioned at one point that if anyone went to hell, he would meet them there. That he "would be the one at the front, with the pitchfork". Ummmmm...freaky?!

deleted_user 09/04/2012

When I confronted my S about it, he admitted it. He didn't know what a sociopath is, but when I told him all the facts about sociopaths, their behaviors and why he fit the profile of a sociopath, he didn't seem surprised. On the other hand when I confronted my N about it, he got very defensive and told me, "that's what all of you people with problems say about other people. I'm not an narcissist. The rest of you are the ones who are fucked up." wow.....

axertis 09/04/2012

I promised her anonymity, so I can't really say. But prior to that time, when I mentioned it several times during my discovery of her D&D, she was her usual "whatever" about it. She tried to deny it once, but there was no wind in her sails. She didn't know what it was when I first told her, really. I read that many of them don't realize it until their 30's. But when I described how it might have evolved in her with the compassion I have. She didn't try to fight me over it. She just attacked some other ridiculous aspect of my part in the conversation. I've read that it's not a good idea to let them know we know... after I let her know... and I worried about it, and how much further that may push her, but I quickly started to apply so much of the other good advice, up to and including 'no contact', that when all was said and done she had no real power in the relationship anymore and she quietly went away.
I know she wouldn't honor my anonymity. But that shouldn't change what I would do. The ends don't justify the means, and I shouldn't justify taking on the indiscretions of my adversaries in order to succeed.
I have to think though, in this whole wide world... there have to be many, many people who have been falsely accused of the disorder(s). To me, it doesn't really matter if she is or isn't (her actions fit the bill in every category over a long period of time, so), when I applied the advice that was given in learning about them, I became better, the insanity dissipated, and I was on my way to happiness again.
It seems to me they would find some satisfaction in finding out.
It seems to me finding out could make them even more dangerous.

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