My ex discarded me long before I left. I left before he destroyed me, that's how I see it. I was a liability because I had a mind of my own like you, I had his child and children take attention up and are expensive, I wanted him to be a proper father not a zombie computer addict dad so I was inconvenient and I had no money or job at the time. It was easy for him to abuse me until I left.

Some of my exes ex girlfriends had said the truth to him in the past, told him he was abusive controlling, emailed the other woman, etc etc. He had a trail of destruction before me so I know this.

The crazy thing is that nothing you do or say really affects the p or goes deep with him. Initially he will react but they have no conscience or feelings that are deep so they don't remember in the same way that we do. Nothing you do or say really matters to them.

At this point in time he doesn't gain anything from being with you, if he felt He could use you again he would. What a sick and twisted man ! You are worth so much more, the p can only ever use and discard. It's always bad with them.

That is so true. The discard process is usually well under way long before the relationship is over. Eventually usually the victim gathers enough strength to end it but it was over long before.

Psychopaths thrive on drama and can handle a lot of people at the same time , spreading it around will hurt you. I don't know your ex, but I think it's too soon for you to deal with people's opinion on what happened to you. After four year I still question my experience with him sometimes. It has to be solid.

Dana did your relationship end four years ago?

Yeah I don't know. It's just crazy to me. I never could understand how he could empathize with me over abortions and my conflict with having a child. I could not understand that someone who loved me SOOOO much could not get it. I didn't know he was a SP. It all makes sense now. I spent two years trying to figure out how he didn't see my side at all. I could find no humanity in him at all. None. It was crazy. Unreal. He never cared about me he only cared about what I could do for him. The OW spends money on him, takes care of him. I Never did that. I fed his ego but that was it. I mean he actually convinced me for a long time that I forced him unto this child. I believed I tricked him. In my right mind I knew I didn't but I would've gladly owned and/kit believed anything he wanted if it meant he would acknowledge the innocent child.

It did end then.

But I had another interaction with him via phone and Facebook 6 months ago.

Members here are extremely lucky. Not everyone get a chance to discuss and learn about p/s/n. Some people just wonder for the rest of their lives "what the hell happened to me".
I asked for help but couldn't find it. Now I finally have the language and I am working on skills.

Imagine you are interacting with someone and suddenly there is a camera held in front of you.
He knows you are being taped, but you are not aware.
You are kind of like a reality TV star, dealing with everything that's thrown at you , by the production/ control like it's real life and you don't have a script. Everything shows , your vulnerabilities, your inner most thoughts, your wishes are in the spot light.
He on the other hand, is a fictional character reading from a script and knowing what's going to happen next till the show / movie ends.
He knows that everything you say may be used against you and he is very aware of the camera because he is a an actor/ illusionist / performer.
Completely different.

Great analysis. Oddly my ex wanted to an actor....badly. Didn't work out for him but he was never shy to say "I'm an actor- it's what I do best". He was like a robot. Like no emotions. All manufactured for the "stage".

So your ex turned his life into a stage...

What's amazing that once the psychopath is gone the camera goes with him. It seemed like forever, the time I was with him, and I had to readjust to real life. It's a bit more boring, but so worth it.

His most beloved girlfriends were show girls - prostitute, Protester/actor/ singer ...the last one is a self proclaimed journalist , presenting their relationship on social media.

I can understand him now, but I cannot predict his reactions. He is unpredictable because he acts like other people and I don't know what going on inside their mind. He started acting like his girlfriend and I don't know her and cannot predict the reaction.

You can either do what he wants and take the risk of not satisfying him and him throwing you out of his life whenever he likes or, establish boundaries, and do what you want and then live in peace with the consequence, because it was your choice for yourself.

His new relationship may last longer than my future ones or be happier because it has excitement and she doesn't know about him what I know and probably never will. They look like brother and sister and still I don't envy her or him. They are shallow and unauthentic with themselves and the other.
It's a show. I can watch entertainment and be drawn to it, but not live in it.