What you said so far doesn't necessarily mean he's a psychopath. Psychopaths typically have numerous short term marriages, so not ever being married is not a sign of psychopathy. The few other things you mentioned could be anything. Anyone could be a sex addict. He sounds like he's definitely a pervert. IQ is not correlated with psychopathy. There are stupid psychopaths and smart psychopaths. You'd have to give more info. Feel free to look in the "news" section in this group for diagnostic criteria. Sorry about your cancer diagnosis. I hope you have supportive people in your life to help you through it.

Thank you AgentSmith for your reply. I don't think I understand the difference between the sociopathic personality and the psychopathy personality.

He is charming, comes from money and is a bit naïve about street smarts. Very well-read. Looks down on the common people but I found him handsome, charming and he was always kind to me so I feel hard and to think he now ignores my texts and emails, and doesn't seem to care about the cancer, but yet he once offered to take me to the doctor? It makes no sense to me.

His own brother told me he thinks he is a narcissist? And other people tell me he's a sociopath. He is very cold and callous at times. I think he's basically a phony. Pretends to care but doesn't. He has a 20 year old son he has not seen in 18 years. He walked out on the boy. Refuses to talk about it. Doesn't seem to care he is a father.

There is really no such thing a psychopathic or sociopathic personality disorder. It is Antisocial Personality Disorder but at times in history has been called psychopathy or sociopathy. It all describes the same set of behaviors.

He sounds like he definitely has a PD though it'd be hard to say which one. A lot of cluster C's and even Cluster A's can abandon their children. So that's not uncommon throughout PDs in general. I dated a cluster C who had 3 children by 2 women and didn't have any part in any of their upbringing. All 3 kids were raised by their respective grandparents (their mothers had also abandoned them).

It'd really be difficult to say what's wrong with him. But the point is that you realize something is wrong with him and it would be best to stay away from him.

thank you and yes! I am staying away from him. Broke it off just last week. Of course he ignored my message but what else is new? He was famous for me writing my heart out and then just pretending I didn't exist but when he wrote me a message and I didn't reply, he would go get very angry with me.

The thing that ended it this time was I got a nasty email from him saying that "Don't involved me with the dealings of my brother, I don't want him mad at me because of YOU>" That offended me. His brother who is an identical twin, was bothering me to go out with him. Of course I refused. They did not speak for 5 years because of an argument over another woman who was sleeping with both of them and one is very violent. He punched her face in and she had to get a restraining order. I would not get involved with the twin brother. I plainly had no interest but somewhere along the line he thought I was. When I told him my loyalty was to him, he just ignored me and began posting nude photos of himself on a sex site and soliciting women.

Wow, a lot of what you are saying reminds me of the last guy I dated. He was diagnosed with cluster C personality disorders and aspergers but a lot of his behaviors largely overlapped behaviors I had previously witnessed in psychopaths (cluster B's). So either there is just an overlap with all PDs, or he also had a lot of cluster B traits, it's hard to say which. But he would do what you just described, he often ignored me, sometimes for weeks or months on end out of the blue for no reason (I attribute this to his Avoidant Personality Disorder). But if I didn't respond to a message from him in 20 min, he'd get upset. Funny how they can't handle their own behavior mirrored back at them! He also did the same thing where he didn't want me talking to any of his "friends" about his behavior. When I did, I was "ruining their life". (By telling them the things he didn't want them to know that he was doing/saying behind their backs). Of course this was all my fault, ruining their lives by letting them know what kind of real "friend" he was to them. Not his fault for being such an asshole to everyone. Nope, my fault for cluing everyone in on it. They have a lovely way of twisting around reality to suit them. This guy was a sex addict as well. I found out he had created a fake account (using a mutual coworker's identity) to sext with his "best friend" (a married woman, he was friends with her and her husband and hung out with them regularly) without her realizing it was him (all along she thought it was the other coworker). He also lied to me from day 1 saying he doesn't like porn, doesn't watch porn, etc. But in reality was watching it daily. He repeated that lie hundreds of times to me, throughout the "relationship". And he also had a secret wife that he was talking to daily and hiding from me. The thing is, they are so insecure that they need a lot of attn from several women to feel good about themselves. It's disgusting and pathetic.

I think his brother might be right. And your own observation that "he doesn't care." Sounds like narcissistic personality disorder which I think is now called antisocial. That's what I discovered about my husband after 16 years. Get away as fast as you can. No one is getting the best of him. You're right he is fake.

Hope you are successful in your fight against cancer. If you get rid of him, you've then cured yourself of cancer. I am not making light of your illness I'm a cancer survivor myself. I truly believe Narcissists are as dangerous as cancer.

I hope you have the strength for all that you're dealing with, it's a lot.

AgentSmith, my husband said you are going to destroy all the relationships I have spent years developing with the picture you have painted of me. It's their m.o. Nothing's their fault it is always someone else hurting them, they are always the victim.

thank you Mobuknows. I have so much on my plate, the last thing I need was to wonder if he was dumping on me every 2 minutes. He just doesn't care at all. I finally told him off. I couldn't stand it anymore

I have a sick mother, too much to deal with and there is no future in him like he told me there was. Of course I imagine he lied about that too. Told me he loved me, yeah right.