Transgenders and Their Significant Others Community Group
This is a group for Transgender Individuals and their Significant Others (Wife, Husband, Fiance/e, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, etc). This includes gay/lesbian and straight relationships and weather one or both are TG. It is to help know what each is going through along be with others going through similar situations. Please no haters. I understand some may have a hard time...
Hi everyone,
Hoping you can give me some insight on my situation. First off some background, I am 35 years old and about 4 years ago I came out. I never really dated or have a lot of experiences with guys; fooled around a but nothing serious. About 2 years ago I met a guy on a social app and we hit it off and met. That night I found out that he was F to M transgender. After some very awkward texts and conversations we talk about it. Obviously, he is not very comfortable talking about it. We started to date and have been in a monogamous relationship for just over two years. Here is where the problem lies, I love him but I feel like I am missing out on something. There are times where I just really really want to be with a biological male for certain things. I am trying not to be graphic on here but I think you can get what I am saying.
I feel awful about this because he has no control over how he was born and I really do love him, okay he drives me crazy at times, but he is my best friend and I do love him. They only thing missing is his genitalia. There are times where I feel like I am not even in a gay relationship or faking it. I don't know how to deal with this b/c, like I said I love him, but still feel like I am missing out.
Anyone out there in the same situation? Ideas? Suggestions?
Hoping you can give me some insight on my situation. First off some background, I am 35 years old and about 4 years ago I came out. I never really dated or have a lot of experiences with guys; fooled around a but nothing serious. About 2 years ago I met a guy on a social app and we hit it off and met. That night I found out that he was F to M transgender. After some very awkward texts and conversations we talk about it. Obviously, he is not very comfortable talking about it. We started to date and have been in a monogamous relationship for just over two years. Here is where the problem lies, I love him but I feel like I am missing out on something. There are times where I just really really want to be with a biological male for certain things. I am trying not to be graphic on here but I think you can get what I am saying.
I feel awful about this because he has no control over how he was born and I really do love him, okay he drives me crazy at times, but he is my best friend and I do love him. They only thing missing is his genitalia. There are times where I feel like I am not even in a gay relationship or faking it. I don't know how to deal with this b/c, like I said I love him, but still feel like I am missing out.
Anyone out there in the same situation? Ideas? Suggestions?
I agree with Melinda, I think you need to speak about this with him so that you are both on the same page. Maybe you can work this out, maybe even therapy might help, but the point is secrets are not good in a relationship. And if he doesn't like talking about certain things, then I think its time he gets some therapy to help him to be more open. Maybe he's ashamed of who he is, I really don't know him enough to say.
I gotta say, this guy is 10 times more lucky then I am, because he has someone who cares about him so much, I think that is just so sweet! :)