Hi!

So this is something I have been struggling with for a long time. I knew I was a guy when I was a young child. But as a child I also loved pink and to play with dolls and all that typical girly stuff. Generally I think I liked both typical girl and boy stuff but still I looked like a little girl who did all the girly stuff. Back then I though I was actually supposed to be a guy but since I fit with being a girl so well it wasn't so bad. Puberty was when it got really bad. But since I had been so girly and I had loved doing my dolls hair and makeup I though I had to be a girl and did my best to convince myself of it by wearing makeup and dresses and just trying to be as stereotypical a girl as I could be. And I really tried hard but in the end I came to the realization that that wasn't going to work out for me and being myself as a guy was the only way I could ever be content. So recently I came out to my best friend who has known me all my life. She said she would always support and love me, which I am very gratefull for, but she also said she had a hard time understanding especially since I "showed no sings" as a child because I was so girly. And this is exactly why I sometimes doubt myself. How can I be a guy if I was a stereotypical girl as a child? I sometimes feel like me identifying as a guy isn't valid because of how I acted, but then I think I already though I was I guy as a child while playing with barbies and just being "a girl". But the reaction of my best friend makes me think of how other people who are not so supportive will react and it also makes me doubt myself and I just really don't know what to do. I can't live as a woman but I also don't feel like my feelings are valid enought to actually transition.

So, has anyone experienced something similar or had similar thoughts?