I had an epiphany this week and I already feel a bit better. This last week I have been so grumpy, angry, sad and overwhelmed by everything. I felt like I was just a hairs breath away from crying and never being able to stop. If you knew me you would know that was not me. I tend to be very stoic and not show much emotion. I do not cry in public....heck I dont even cry at home. I have not really felt any joy in life for a while. Some of that was due to always being busy with tending to my son's life and everyone else. I guess you could say that I am a control freak, helicopter mom and type A personality. Which is tough because we all know one can not control a tbi person. I felt like I had hit my rock bottom. I am tired of not being me. I happened to have some of my son's lexapro that he did not want to take. I know that I should not being using his medication but I was desperate. I did get the wheels turning regarding finding a doctor. I will be consulting with one very soon. The funny thing is that I already seem to feel better....maybe even a bit of my spunk back. It could be all in my head ,but who cares at this point the reason why.
So by calling uncle I have lifted some of the dead weight off my shoulders. I do not have to be strong all the time because it is impossible anyways. Hopefully I will be able to find my old self in all this chaos, which is funny because my son is trying to do the same thing.



hugs...pam