Great advice. The only problem I have is the "guilt trip" one. What if it's the Holy Spirit convicting their heart?? They may not recognize this as God's way of speaking to them and just too easily say that we are "guilt tripping" them?? Anyway, sometimes I think it's good to feel guilty..I know for myself. It means that I still have a healthy conscience and my heart is soft enough to hear from God when I need to be corrected. It's when the heart turns to stone, and the conscience is no longer sensitive..that's what the Bible talks about....seared consciences.
I pray that it doesn't get to that point.
Acts chapter 24 verse 16:
"So I strive always to keep my conscience clear before God and man." (NIV)

maddie, I do agree with you on this one. However, I still posted it because quite often what can happen with guilt is that it is not always true guilt that a parent is the goal. (not sure goal is the right word to use here) But what I mean is that people should be very aware of of what they are using as a basis. In other words there are two types of guilt - true guilt based on actions committed against God's Word or false guilt based on their own man-made rules. Example: not sending a card on Mother's Day is a man-made rule. They have not committed a wrong against God for neglecting this courtesy that card companies generated to increase their card business sales. Yes, they are courtesies that caring children do and it does sting when the message they have sent is.."I don't care enough about you to do what other's do for their parents".....but perhaps guilt about things like that should be avoided. So that is why I left the article in.

Comments on any article is perfectly welcomed.

I am the one with the guilt trip and its a huge button and my son knows how to push it well. I am the one that gets critized and told how much I messed up. I have asked for forgiveness and acknowledge my mistakes. He tells me every now and then that he loves me but only if he is talking to me at that point in our life and only if I say it first and only if he is getting his way on things. He cuts me off when he doesn't like the rules or doesn't like my response to his questions or my actions or lack of actions. For example he quit talking to me when I quit letting him use my car. He told me he was "looking for jobs" and I found out that he was smoking dope with his friends and running around town and wasting my gas that I work to pay for. So since I was footing the bill and he was not telling the truth I cut him off. He quit talking to me. He is in jail again and he has called and wrote my mom and sister numerous times but not me. I wrote him and he wrote them saying he was fine until he got my letter which depressed him. All I told him is that we planted a garden, and that we did not have the money to bail him out early and his sister missed him and Joey says hi and that's it. Wow - depressing. I just don't know what to do or say any more. I know I made mistakes and I own that part. I chose the wrong men for his life - my ex was abusive to us. I get that I screwed up in a BIG way. But drugs, skipping school, getting in trouble with the law, dropping out of school, hitting me and his sister, stealing from me and his sister, lying, etc are choices that he makes. I don't act the way my parents did because I chose not to. At some point doesn't he have to make the choice to be different and change. I am so lost and so hurt and so confused. I cry myself to sleep some nights, some nights I don't sleep. I am always on the verge of tears. I just don't know what to do anymore. I just want to give up completely on every thing. On top of all this my daughter is living with her dad - to get to know him better. She is trying to accomplish something with her life. I am proud of both of them but lot of hurt where my son is concerned. I know I wasnt a great mother and I messed up big where my kids are concerned. If only I could go back things would be so different. But I can't so I try to make now different but he won't let me. I just .... well you know.