SURVIVORS OF SOCIOPATHS Community Group
A group where we support one another and share our experiences with each other about narcissistic relationships. a place to heal if you have been "touched" by a sociopath. there is hope. share your experience strength and hope here with others who have been where you are. together we help each other heal...
I just got back from a Vegas trip...and just when I thought I had my perfect little getaway weekend, I had a nightmare about my ex. I feel like I can't avoid him no matter what I do because I always see him in my head.
I had a dream that I was chasing after him and parking outside of his house waiting for him to come back to me. Or walking my dog by his house waiting for him to notice me. And one day I walked by and I saw him and his ex wife and his four year old kid playing in his yard. And he introduced me to them without any remorse and in this happy little way and I was stuck with his ex wife just gossiping while my heart hurt from him. And then I found myself back outside in his driveway, but this time he texted me saying "I know you've been waiting outside of my house every day. Stop wasting my time and go date one of my friends or something"
His face was so vivid in my dream. I'm just so tired of being tormented by memories of him and his face. Its been six months.........
And I feel like in many ways posting on this site has been a healthy way for me to vent but its also just made me realize how angry I am about him and how he hurt me so much and left me in the dirt. All I see is anger, anger, anger...but no relief. I'm angry at how he broke my heart and how I meant nothing to him...but when will I ever recover?
I had a dream that I was chasing after him and parking outside of his house waiting for him to come back to me. Or walking my dog by his house waiting for him to notice me. And one day I walked by and I saw him and his ex wife and his four year old kid playing in his yard. And he introduced me to them without any remorse and in this happy little way and I was stuck with his ex wife just gossiping while my heart hurt from him. And then I found myself back outside in his driveway, but this time he texted me saying "I know you've been waiting outside of my house every day. Stop wasting my time and go date one of my friends or something"
His face was so vivid in my dream. I'm just so tired of being tormented by memories of him and his face. Its been six months.........
And I feel like in many ways posting on this site has been a healthy way for me to vent but its also just made me realize how angry I am about him and how he hurt me so much and left me in the dirt. All I see is anger, anger, anger...but no relief. I'm angry at how he broke my heart and how I meant nothing to him...but when will I ever recover?
bellanomore
6 months is a long time but not long enough. you are still filled with displaced anger and this to shall pass. they fill your thoughts and it comes out in crazy dreams. i used to have such real awful dreams that they felt real. in coming here you are going through the pain. walking the path if recovering and it takes a lot of time. i know everyone is different but the one thing i heard over and over was give it time. it drove me crazy to hear that because it was the one thing i couldnt change or make myself have now !!! just know your feelings are validated. what you are feeling and going through is right on schedule. in time the dreams will come to an end. you have a come a long way keep going forward and know this too shall pass. i believe the more we get out in places like here, the sooner we heal. it gets it out and lets go. dont give up hevvee your on your way !!!!!
bellanomore
sorry for the typos i hope that made some sense. just know what your feeling and experiencing is normal and right on time. if you have time look back on the posts here and read the 5 stages of grief. i think you are at the place where you are feeling all 5 of them at the same time now which means you have come a long long way. please look back and find that post it desribes where you are now. just hang on.
deleted_user
The dreams....I have them often. I hate them. But it's a way of healing. I repeatedly dream of my ex and his cheating and laughing about it. I once had a dream where I was sitting on top of him bashing his head into the cement over and over while he begged me to stop. I felt a bit bad that I dreamed that. But it was my mind's way of releasing a lot of the anger I was left with.
bellanomore
exactly and your mind knows how to heal itself. the dreams will stop in time i promise. your mind is dealing with and healing from the abuse. i stopped dreaming around 1 year. i know everyone is different but something happens around the one year mark. you really start to notice your healing and you realize just how far you have come.
deleted_user
Good to know Bella! Can't wait for that point in time!
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