SURVIVORS OF SOCIOPATHS Community Group
A group where we support one another and share our experiences with each other about narcissistic relationships. a place to heal if you have been "touched" by a sociopath. there is hope. share your experience strength and hope here with others who have been where you are. together we help each other heal...
No Contact & The Narcissist
I found a very interesting article on how to get over a breakup with a narcissist. I have found that many emotionally unavailable men/women fall under this category and are actually narcissists. Sadly, many of them don't even realize that they are narcissists. After reading this, I found that the man I was in a FWB relationship with for 5 years is actually a narcissist. For more information on narcissists and narcissistic behavior in relationships please also see the link below. This article stresses the importance of going and staying in NC with this type of relationship. I am so thankful that I was able to walk away with my dignity & before he could do any further damage than what he's already done.
I hope that the following information will be useful to someone who has been or is currently in a relationship/FWB/or marriage with a narcissist. This information comes from the article "No Contact Rule and Narcissism" and is brought to you from the site " "Squidoo" 2012. It has really shed light on the type of relationship I was in with this man. It has also given me strength and determination in staying in NC with my ex.
Why no Contact with a Narcissist?
After ANY romantic relationship ends, following the no contact rule with your ex is recommended. Regardless who was the one to end the relationship, there are still many emotions involved. Keeping contact with your ex only prolongs the pain. In order to move on, one must keep distance between themselves and their ex-partner. Despite the popular notion that the no-contact rule should be used as a way to get your ex back, in reality it is about dignity, healing and closure.
With a narcissist, all of the above reasons to implement no-contact apply, but there are even more reasons to maintain no-contact with a narcissist:
-You give yourself time and space to understand why you got involved and stayed involved with a narcissist.
-You avoid continued psychological and emotional abuse perpetrated by your ex. Often when we are in a relationship with a narcissist it is hard to see their true nature clearly. They often employ 'crazy-making' techniques to confuse you. It is crucial to have distance from your ex so that you don't get sucked back into their head games.
-You can get closure through no contact. You can't get it from your ex, because they are UNABLE to relate to you are a healthy, empathetic individual; you can only get it by learning to love YOUR life again.
-You get your dignity back! You're not trying to convince the narcissist you're right or convince him/her to care.
-You get the last word by say NOTHING at all! You may feel you wan't to rage at your ex and tell them what a horrible person they are, but this woll never work. Any contact you make with your narcissistic ex will be perceived by them as you still caring about and needing him/her. The best way to insult a narcissist is by NOT contacting them and showing that they don't matter to you at all!
-You don't get sucked back into their narcissistic drama. Narcissists will be nice for a time to hook up back in. Maybe you'll think they've finally realized the error of their ways and have changed, but you must remember that narcissists are incapable of changing! Don't give them the opportunity to hurt you again!
http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/342062-no-contact-narcissist
I found a very interesting article on how to get over a breakup with a narcissist. I have found that many emotionally unavailable men/women fall under this category and are actually narcissists. Sadly, many of them don't even realize that they are narcissists. After reading this, I found that the man I was in a FWB relationship with for 5 years is actually a narcissist. For more information on narcissists and narcissistic behavior in relationships please also see the link below. This article stresses the importance of going and staying in NC with this type of relationship. I am so thankful that I was able to walk away with my dignity & before he could do any further damage than what he's already done.
I hope that the following information will be useful to someone who has been or is currently in a relationship/FWB/or marriage with a narcissist. This information comes from the article "No Contact Rule and Narcissism" and is brought to you from the site " "Squidoo" 2012. It has really shed light on the type of relationship I was in with this man. It has also given me strength and determination in staying in NC with my ex.
Why no Contact with a Narcissist?
After ANY romantic relationship ends, following the no contact rule with your ex is recommended. Regardless who was the one to end the relationship, there are still many emotions involved. Keeping contact with your ex only prolongs the pain. In order to move on, one must keep distance between themselves and their ex-partner. Despite the popular notion that the no-contact rule should be used as a way to get your ex back, in reality it is about dignity, healing and closure.
With a narcissist, all of the above reasons to implement no-contact apply, but there are even more reasons to maintain no-contact with a narcissist:
-You give yourself time and space to understand why you got involved and stayed involved with a narcissist.
-You avoid continued psychological and emotional abuse perpetrated by your ex. Often when we are in a relationship with a narcissist it is hard to see their true nature clearly. They often employ 'crazy-making' techniques to confuse you. It is crucial to have distance from your ex so that you don't get sucked back into their head games.
-You can get closure through no contact. You can't get it from your ex, because they are UNABLE to relate to you are a healthy, empathetic individual; you can only get it by learning to love YOUR life again.
-You get your dignity back! You're not trying to convince the narcissist you're right or convince him/her to care.
-You get the last word by say NOTHING at all! You may feel you wan't to rage at your ex and tell them what a horrible person they are, but this woll never work. Any contact you make with your narcissistic ex will be perceived by them as you still caring about and needing him/her. The best way to insult a narcissist is by NOT contacting them and showing that they don't matter to you at all!
-You don't get sucked back into their narcissistic drama. Narcissists will be nice for a time to hook up back in. Maybe you'll think they've finally realized the error of their ways and have changed, but you must remember that narcissists are incapable of changing! Don't give them the opportunity to hurt you again!
http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/342062-no-contact-narcissist
By educating ourselves about these monsters, we're basically strengthening our "armor" to protect ourselves. Making ourselves stronger, more informed. There truly is power with knowledge. And it feels SO good to be getting my power back.