Actually, I have to say, I feel the same way after having left Sh: it IS easier, ALONE, without Sh. Sometimes it's more lonely in two, than being on your own. That definitely rang true for me. I just had to admit it!

I mean its sad that he said that to me when he broke up with me. It hurt me a lot......eepecially if someone who supposedly loved you once said that to you.

its been hard without him and hard realizing how much he emotionally screwed me up so I can't speak for myself but...hopefully things will get easier over time

So this is for YOU, heyvee :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kGmjb9Qhzg

My SH wrote me a letter and an email, saying "nobody likes a dream to go up in smoke" (referring to the end of our marriage) followed by "I'm sorry I couldn't make you happy", but he never apologized for trying to strike me twice, or throwing a ball of paper towel at me.They are weird people, or a more clinical term "personality disorder".

My ex never apologized for anything or even cared to shoe that we once had a relationship full of care and lust and affection.
he just disappeared for three days after he threw me off of him in our last fight. Then I called him begging to talk to him and he said "its easier to be alone"
and he was gone.
then a week later after begging to talk to him again and crying my eyes out that's when he accused me of being crazy and just like his ex and how he never meant anything he said to me

otherwise there was no closure, no saying he was sorry for my pain, nothing. He just threw me away

Hewee, that's what these abnormal people do, devalue, discard and act like they never had a relationship with us. After I left the marital home, my SH told sent me a text stating "he had another woman that cooked him breakfast, and dinner and that she has a round ass just the way he likes it....after two weeks. I was hurt, so hurt how can you tell your wife something like this and not, acknowledge how that might hurt me or acknowledge that we are married. They don't care, and they will never apologize.

Mine NEVER apologiged either for nothing and always PUT the blame on ME...

As soon as he found out i may have cancer i have to get a major surgery next week he just discared me like trash also, he claims i discared him like trash and told me dont put a guilt trip on him ,he reverses everything everything he does to me he claims he sees in me. So that tells me these people know what they do and thats even more sick !!! He is a conffusing sick son of a gun that i wish I never now met ! 2 yrs of my life wasted ......Hugs to u

Candy, that is horrible what he did but not surprising because that is in their make-up.. My SH laughed at me when he thought I might have had thyroid cancer. He took it as a joke, and even laughed, but thank God the test came back negative that it wasn't cancer.

What type of people leave you in the most vulnerable state or make jokes about something serious, such as cancer. They are evil, just plain evil. I knew there were mean people, but these people are downright evil to the bone.

I woke up with a terrible reaction "down there" and started freaking out. When I texted mine in this worried and long heart-wrenching text regarding my fear of possibly having hpv/something else (and also secretly freaking out about the possibility that he may have given me something) after crying all night about it all he texted me back was "Thats weird. I'm running I cant talk to you right now"

Are you kidding me?
If I had a partner who was distressed and afraid and in pain physically and worried about their physical health I would be asking them if they were ok and showing my concern and calling them. Obviously running was more important to him.

Candy and breakfree I am so sorry to hear of their reactions to your health in that way. theyre just awful human beings. Thank goodness you are free of them now!

Hevee, I hope you don't have anything "down there". Go get yourself tested right away.

I dont. Thank god!
But can you imagine? Dealing with this heartbreak and a bonus?! Oh god

I had minor surgery last year and my wife INSISTED on getting up at 4am to give me pain meds. I argued with her that if I needed it I could easily take it myself, I didn't want her to have to get up just for that, but she refused to back down. Months later I saw a post on Facebook that she was complaining that she had to get up to give "someone" their meds. She was able to play the victim to her friends under the guise that she was taking care of me. Who would possibly believe this crap? I'm also remembering her insisting on getting up to make me coffee in the morning, I was not allowed to make my own coffee, even when I insisted. Its obvious to me now she had played me to her friends and family that she did everything while I did nothing. Its so infuriating, there's no way to defend myself, no one was there to see all the times I was forbidden to help with the dishes, or a number of other things, because she described herself as a control freak, and had to do things herself. Who in their right mind would even think they were the center of an elaborate scheme to be set up as the villain. She never let me help with anything, and then always told me I never did anything.

She too, never apologized for anything, ever over 8 years. She did however, develop a new tactic where a few times she would tell me she was sorry that her behavior made me feel the way it did, but would still fight to the death with the earth burning in the background that she did nothing wrong, but she was sorry I felt the way I did.

A week after she discarded me she told me it was great, all her anxiety was gone. A week later and she is magically cured of her 8 year long abusive relationship with me. A month into the discard I was standing in the corner, trying to catch my breathe while crying. I decided I had every right to call her and tell her how I was feeling, that I was devastated, destroyed, everything I did was for her and my baby girl and it wasn't fair what she did. Her response, she was sorry I was feeling the way I was, and if she could take my pain away she would, but she couldn't talk now and if I wanted to talk this weekend, send her a text or e-mail.

tohellagain, I'm sorry you were hurt so badly. It's an awful kind of pain, and divorce is an ugly thing. You didn't deserve such manipulation and drama. Yes, the narcissists and sociopaths love to play the victim card. My stbx (soon to be ex) is pulling that nonsense right now, too. Telling all kinds of lies to his family and friends. I'm debating how to deal with it.... think I'll just play it by ear for now.

Your last paragraph made me want to cry, "... she couldn't talk now and if I wanted to talk this weekend, send her a text or e-mail." Wow, what a heartless witch. Such injustices piss me off so bad. You deserved so much better than this.

I hope things are improving for you. This is such a difficult time, and my heart goes out to you. Hang in there, and know there are many of us here rooting for you. You aren't alone in this journey of healing. There will be good days and bad days, mostly bad in the beginning, but they will get better. Be good to yourself and keep writing. It helps. Big hug to you, my friend.

being alone used to be my biggest fear in life, now i dont know how to be any other way. weird. never really thought about that till now.