SURVIVORS OF SOCIOPATHS Community Group

A group where we support one another and share our experiences with each other about narcissistic relationships. a place to heal if you have been "touched" by a sociopath. there is hope. share your experience strength and hope here with others who have been where you are. together we help each other heal...

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Rkehoe903 05/31/2018

Id like to start wwithin apology, as this post is all over the place. Anyway, here goes. My perception is so fucked thanks to him that I dont even know what's real. Like everyday I wonder if I'm dreaming. I hope that I'll wake up and this nightmare will be over. He just treats it like a game too, like he didnt ruin my life. And I fall for it everytime. I'll try to get away but I always get pulled in. For 4 years he conditioned me to be a sex slave for him, convincing me that everyone who tried to get me away from him was the abusing me and bad for me. What's real? I'm not sure. I dont know how to connect to people without sexual intimacy. I don't know who's really on my side and who wants me to for personal gain. I cant ne in relationships because he'll just pull me from them everytime. I feel so guilty for letting him have so much power over me, but I also know that he has isolated me for 4 years. Even when we were around other people, it was "play time" so to speak. I have done unspeakable things for him, I have gone through so much for him. He wont even let me out now that were out of school. Hes gotten me hooked on drugs to keep him in business. I'm afraid to tell anyone because I honestly dont know how to live without his "guidance", I'm afraid I'll be blamed and get in trouble, and I'm honestly afraid of hurting him. I dont know how I'll ever get it to end. I'm sorry this is all over the place, I'm truly panicking upon realizing that there seems like no end in sight. Even now, I'm afraid hell somehow find this. I can never feel safe.

Ghostwolf04 05/31/2018

Go to court and get a restraining order. My ex was like that too. I was strong before I met him and he was always angry he couldn't break me more. I got away and so can you. I was afraid to call the cops because he was a cop. I never got on drugs but there is rehab for that. Check yourself into a clinic and he can't get you there. Therapists can help. The police can help. He had isolated you so it would be hard for you to do this on your own. What he told you is normal is not. It is rape and exploitation. Most people believe him to be a deviant. Most people aren't into that sick stuff despite what he is telling you. It's abuse, not consentual. You are a victim, not a culprit. You need to get yourself out. Be strong!

Rkehoe903 05/31/2018

Thank you. It's been really hard lately, I just feel so lost in what I need to do and what I can do without panicking. I've opened up about it to some people and I'm hoping that, with their support, I can finally move on. These groups really do help me believe that getting away is possible, thank you so much

Eternallystronger76 06/13/2018

Hi there. His "guidance" is called control and he has groomed you to be dependant on him. You can get away and you will. Find some support from family and old friends, they are still there and will help you pick up the pieces, if he has told you otherwise it is a lie. Once you are away you will begin to heal and see things for what they really are. You will slowly regain your inner strength and your self trust. He has, in effect, brainwashed you to believe that you need him to survive but you don't. I agree with the restraining order, you have been the victim of emotional domestic violence as a minimum. I have just left my sociopath and I am feeling stronger already now I can see things clearly and I am coping by being angry at him. I have a right to be after all he put me through and you will see you have a right to feel how you need to feel as well. Find your strength, it is there, then run and don't look back.

Nolongertheprey 07/23/2018

I know what is going on with my sociopath--and he honest to God has EVERY symptom that Ive read--and I feel dumb and used and lonely. I know he was a lie, that it was all a mask, but accepting that it was all fake is so hard. How does someone hold you, look into your eyes, make love to you, promise his life to you and it all be a game? A nothing. How can I have been so duped....Im hurt right now and hate him but I also miss him and I know its sick as fuck, but hes trained me. He says no one else would want me and that he is the only one that will ever love me. But his love isn't real. Its sick and twisted and I feel like I just want to crawl in a hole and hide. Im so embarrassed and also lonely. I miss how safe I felt with him, sleeping next to him in bliss...and it was all fake :(

Iwillnotbesilent 02/12/2019

I know what you mean. My ex and I did a dance of blocking each other and then running right back to one another. He got at least 5 new numbers and 3 new social media accounts to contact me. I felt trapped, but when he left I missed him and worried about me. I haven’t talked to him in a few months, but I found myself a new boyfriend that actually loves me and thinks I’m beautiful inside and out. He has never intentionally hurt me and now we have been together for almost one year. I never thought anyone would love me and now I finally found someone who does. If I can find love I’m sure that all of you can too.

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