Share your thoughts, you are loved, don't go unheard, please, you do matter. Don't give up just yet.
I always felt bored with life, if that makes sense. I felt that way since my second semester in college for 7 years now. I don't want to go through the morbid details about my plan for suicide.
I want to get this off my chest. I planned a suicide attempt that would have me jumping to my death. Normally, I'm scared of heights and death. Yet, I keep pushing myself to commit suicide.
Last week, I was walking towards the place to kill myself, but I got scared and chickened out. I always did this. I tried to kill myself every year for 7 years and I always chickened out.
Then, I keeping pushing myself to overcome my fear of death and kill myself. Last week, I called a suicide hotline after I chickened out. I scheduled a follow up call for a later day.
I forgot about the follow call that day. Today, I pushed myself again to go jump to my death. I was walking towards the top.
Then, I got scared and I turned away. In the end, I didn't feel ashamed about attempting suicide. I felt ashamed that I chickened out, no offense to everyone else who has been through the same thing.
So, that's how my day was.