Strengh and Determination Community Group
This Group is for people who are going through a bad time or just needs some postive words or support.
Learning how to love yourself, or beginning to treat yourself well, is something that women especially, have a hard time doing.
It seems we spend the better part of our lives pleasing and appeasing others, silencing our inner voice, and being riddled with insecurity and a feeling that something is just "missing".
We beat ourselves up pretty badly. Re-playing a small mistake we made over and over again in our minds. Fighting with ourselves… looking at ourselves with disgust… saying things to ourselves that we would never say to any of our friends.
Why do we do it? Because we don’t know any better.
No one tells you how important “loving yourself” is… in fact, they tell you how much you should love others. If you even mention “love yourself FIRST” in polite conversation, people will look at you like you’re a monster.
To love yourself first is definitely selfish. Being "selfish" means being ‘primarily concerned with your own interests’. What is wrong with that? The ONLY rational way to live is to take care of “you” and to treat yourself well.
For all your life, all you have is you. You must make YOU your number one priority. By NOT making loving “you” your primary concern, you will engage in self-destructive behaviors and activities.
Selfishness, even with its negative connotation, is vitally important to your health and well-being.
Besides, you can’t love anyone else if you don’t love you.
How can you give a gift to someone if you don’t already possess it? You cannot give what you don’t have. And that includes LOVE.
Before learning how to love yourself, you are coming to others out of “need”… even if you think that you are “loving” them, you are not… you are manipulating people to get your needs met. You need them to give you a sense of “YOU”.
And that’s why we lose ourselves in our relationships. We allow others’ opinions and approval to run our lives. We give and nurture… sometimes to the point of resentment… and then expect others to fill our emotional well. It simply doesn’t work that way.
Loving yourself FIRST means that you develop a healthy sense of “I” and are not dependent on others to tell you who you are. You give more weight to your inner voice than to what others think or believe about you. You take the responsibility to define and create your own life. It's a part of becoming a healthy individual.
The first step in learning how to love yourself is healing your past.
It seems we spend the better part of our lives pleasing and appeasing others, silencing our inner voice, and being riddled with insecurity and a feeling that something is just "missing".
We beat ourselves up pretty badly. Re-playing a small mistake we made over and over again in our minds. Fighting with ourselves… looking at ourselves with disgust… saying things to ourselves that we would never say to any of our friends.
Why do we do it? Because we don’t know any better.
No one tells you how important “loving yourself” is… in fact, they tell you how much you should love others. If you even mention “love yourself FIRST” in polite conversation, people will look at you like you’re a monster.
To love yourself first is definitely selfish. Being "selfish" means being ‘primarily concerned with your own interests’. What is wrong with that? The ONLY rational way to live is to take care of “you” and to treat yourself well.
For all your life, all you have is you. You must make YOU your number one priority. By NOT making loving “you” your primary concern, you will engage in self-destructive behaviors and activities.
Selfishness, even with its negative connotation, is vitally important to your health and well-being.
Besides, you can’t love anyone else if you don’t love you.
How can you give a gift to someone if you don’t already possess it? You cannot give what you don’t have. And that includes LOVE.
Before learning how to love yourself, you are coming to others out of “need”… even if you think that you are “loving” them, you are not… you are manipulating people to get your needs met. You need them to give you a sense of “YOU”.
And that’s why we lose ourselves in our relationships. We allow others’ opinions and approval to run our lives. We give and nurture… sometimes to the point of resentment… and then expect others to fill our emotional well. It simply doesn’t work that way.
Loving yourself FIRST means that you develop a healthy sense of “I” and are not dependent on others to tell you who you are. You give more weight to your inner voice than to what others think or believe about you. You take the responsibility to define and create your own life. It's a part of becoming a healthy individual.
The first step in learning how to love yourself is healing your past.
deleted_user
That's for sure! Unfortunately I learned all this the hard way. One has to love, respect and take care of themselves first!
tabby2010
I am still trying to learn this I have always taken care of other people before I take care of me well Thats has to stop. I cant keep neglecting my self.
flash85
very well said girl
tabby2010
Thanks Flash 85
flash85
this is kind of quirky but fun at the same time lol
flash85
sorry, i just should have accepted what you said, i'm sorry
tabby2010
Its okay sweetie I am glad that you like my group. Keep replying to things I post. and post your feelings as well If theres something on your mind post it And I will reply. and others will reply.
flash85
i know you won't be able to answer for awhile, just wanted to say thank you
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