Spouses of Sexual Addicts. Community Group
...but wanted to share this definition of wisdom I recently came across with all the spouses here. It's been helping me define and focus on what I want for myself. It's been useful to me at work and elsewhere. Wisdom is:
"...a clear-eyed view of human behavior, keen self-understanding, a
certain tolerance for ambiguity and what might be called the messiness
of life, emotional resiliency, an ability to think clearly in a
circumstance of conflict or stress, a tendency to approach a crisis as
an intriguing puzzle to be solved, an inclination to forgive and move
on, humility enough to know that it is not all about you, a gift for
seeing how smaller facts fit in within a larger picture, a mix of
empathy and detachment, a knack for learning from lifetime
experiences, a way of suspending judgment long enough to achieve
greater clarity, an ability to act coupled with a willingness to
embrace judicious inaction."
"...a clear-eyed view of human behavior, keen self-understanding, a
certain tolerance for ambiguity and what might be called the messiness
of life, emotional resiliency, an ability to think clearly in a
circumstance of conflict or stress, a tendency to approach a crisis as
an intriguing puzzle to be solved, an inclination to forgive and move
on, humility enough to know that it is not all about you, a gift for
seeing how smaller facts fit in within a larger picture, a mix of
empathy and detachment, a knack for learning from lifetime
experiences, a way of suspending judgment long enough to achieve
greater clarity, an ability to act coupled with a willingness to
embrace judicious inaction."
This line is funny to me "an ability to act coupled with a willingness to embrace judicious inaction."
What? I CAN act. I have the ability to, I just embrace inaction.
Don't tell my husband about this, or I'll never get him to help around the house. "I understand your frustration, dear, but I'm embracing judicious inaction today. This is making me wiser."
I too am a total grasshopper here SheenRe... I'm trying to learn new heights in all of these things listed above. But it's that last sentence that seemed to resonate the most with me... because I need to learn how to ACT when I tend to be passive and let go (do judicious inaction) when someone else needs to step up and carry their own load. Finding the balance and timing between these two things doesn't come easy to me. The tolerance for ambiguity thing has been helping me too lately... but I know there was a time a year or so ago when ambiguity was the last thing in the world I needed to embrace...the only things that were going to help me were strong boundaries and clarity, clarity and more clarity!!
Thanks for the warm comments... it's good to be back and yeah, I'm doing well...
I'm so glad when I see progress for each of us!