Pirate, i am a 40 yo woman who has 2 children. Believe me, that isnt a reason in itself to lose your libido. I am in a sexless marriage and i masterbate at least 3 times a week and have been for 10 years or so. Theres nothing wrong with you! Wanting intimacy and an orgasm for gods sake is completely normal. Does your wife have postpartum depression maybe? Or could it be that sex is painful and she doesnt want to tell you? If you havent, i suggest you talk to her about it. My husband is just not interested so i live with my situation because i dont want to divorce him but if theres a problem you can fix, you should try. I struggle with guilt a lot and im here to talk if you need it.

sounds like your relationship is falling apart . the number one issue to resolve is communication, without it nothing will work. you need to tell her every day you love her. then you need closeness snuggle together while watching TV, do things together and become a couple again. your the male you got to win her all over again. If you cant do that, then why bother asking for our advice? just walk away and pay child support. is your other option.

Oftentimes what turns on a women is very different than what gets a man in the mood. Especially when there are small children to care for. Besides snuggling and other forms of physical affection, what other things have you tried? Sometimes just asking your wife how she is feeling and listening with empathy to things she struggles with during the day can make her more open to touching and sex. Have you tried taking on some of her duties for her so she can rest? Make her dinner? Pour her a glass of wine and watch her favorite movie? And try not to go straight for the sex right after...wait a day or two so she doesn’t feel like Your just being nice so you can get laid

Or wait a month or two while giving her attention. These issues don’t fix themselves. Especially overnight. After two kids the only issue with libido (for both of us) was lack of sleep and alone time actually planning dates was harder but important. Find a good sitter! Be gentle and patient and get the talking going. And LISTEN as was mentioned above.

I am in a similar situation. I have told her I love her every day, I have taken on almost all of the household chores, I ask her about her day and try to understand how she is feeling each day. I have tried the snuggling and watching her favourite movie...all I get is more and more frustrated. When we talk about it I get told what I am doing wrong. I corrected these things and still nothing...any advice?

With two kids that are little do you help with their care, clean, cook and give her breaks? Does she complain about being tired? As a women who did everything at the end of the day having sex was another chore because my husband then was useless on the home front. By helping her, you give her time to focus on you.