Sexless Marriage Community Group

This group is for those people who find themselves married to a partner who has little or no interest in having a sexual relationship. This can be very painful for the other partner and leave them feeling rejected, unloved and unwanted. This is a group to provide support for this very painful and very private issue.

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Relationships & Sexuality
/ Sexless Marriage Support Group

sexless married at 32

soccergirl18
soccergirl18

it's been over 2 years... everytime I try to bring it up or try to be intimate even just cuddling he pushes me away... I've never experienced this in my life I've tried speaking with him but he just completely tunes it out with little disregard for my feelings... over 2 years and I'm not sure how much more I can take..  I'm at breaking point.. weve been together for over 14 years... am I being selfish or is this normal???? 

finallyawakenow
finallyawakenow
No that’s far from normal. Is he unhappy in himself? Depressed people have a hard time feeling connection with another.
What’s really sad is that he’s not willing to talk about it. Personally, I had to do a lot of work on myself before I was emotionally mature enough to have adult conversation about real feelings.
It’s too easy to get stuck in ruts and so f-in hard to break out of them.
Since you can’t change him the best you can do is take good care of yourself. Live the healthiest life you can and love yourself.
scteach01
scteach01
You are not being selfish. This is not normal. It sounds like there may be a problem on his end. Could be depression. Could be ED. Could be something totally out of left field. Have you tried counseling?
Almosthappilymarried
Almosthappilymarried
Hi this isn't what I understand to be healthy-rather than 'normal'. Have been married 20 years and after our first child; sex has occurred no more than 4 times a year since (18 years ago and not from a want of trying on my part). I would suggest counselling, for both or you if you other half isn't interested. As finallyawakenow says-look after you. Everything else will come from that. This is what I have been doing, and am doing. I'm now at a point in life where my children are not so dependent and I can see the things I am grateful to have, but also the things that I want but can't fix alone. This topic has unfortunately become a deep wound over the years, and I have to focus on the fact is isn't about me.