In a previous post I talked about how I am finding myself in a sexless marriage which is very disconcerting for me as I have a decent sex drive. Maybe it's because I'm in my 30s and I'm reaching my peak sexual prowess or maybe it's because I want a baby, I'm not sure of which is more prevalent but regardless, my sexual needs and desires are not being met. I've tried discussing this with my husband many times and every time it just turns into an argument because he feels I'm somehow insulting his manhood or his own sexual prowess. We are intimate but not as much as I'd like to be, and he takes care of himself via porn more than I'd like him to. Anyway, I've decided that instead of wallowing in it and trying to talk it to death, I am going to take matters into my own hands and make him notice that he's f***ing up and needs to get back on the wagon with our bedroom life before it's too late and I just end up resenting him. I am starting camp gladiator next week and I'm going to get my body back into rocking shape because I feel like part of his lack of desire is because I've let myself go. My boobs aren't as perky, my stomach is flabby, my skin breaks out sometimes, and I don't feel confident in a bathing suit. He loves me just the way I am and doesn't complain about my body but I'm thinking that maybe if I start making some changes with my health, he will take notice and not only wanna see me naked and maybe be more attracted to me but maybe he will get in on the exercise fun and get into shape too. I have to be honest here, I haven't really found him all that attractive either because he's either working or sleeping and when he is awake at home, he's watching TV or playing some dumb video game on his phone until the sun comes up and it really irritates me. So I gotta find a way to get him back in the bedroom where he actually wants to be there doing the things we should be doing in bed besides sleeping. I'm determined to make his phone, TV, and porn the last thing he thinks about if at all. I want him to be feigning for me by the time he gets home. Is this a bad thing? Am I a terrible wife for wanting this? I don't want it all the time but I want to be able to tell him no sometimes so he knows how it feels. I don't want to make him insecure but I do want him to understand how bad it sucks when he wants something and can't have it because I'm too tired or not in the mood. I feel like maybe if I start doing more on my own and I start taking better care of myself, he will find me sexier. Bottom line. I want my sex life back dammit!