Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group
Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.
I've been addicted to porn for years. Started watching it when I was really young - my older brother, uncle and cousins all got me into watching it like it was the fun/cool thing to do as guys. I never really thought anything of it and thought it was normal for most of my life.
But I got married and thought it would just go away and was no big deal. But I continued doing it and it just got worse and worse as time went on - my wife found out about it and drew a line that she didn't want me to do it. I started hiding it better and it eventually escalated and I am ashamed to say I cheated on her and she found out. I hate myself for doing it and she's willing to work with me but I just need to work on this part of myself and not sure where to start. Hoping this helps - anybody else going through something like this?
Just recently it escalated very similarly and I too started messaging people. Girlfriend found out and we are now attempting to work through it. Hard to feel like a total piece of shit and know that you caused them that hurt, if anyones figured out how to process that I’d love to hear haha.
Life changing to read this isn’t an isolated experience, thanks for sharing.
Lol it takes time. My wife and I are almost a year in. In that year we only had sex once about a month ago. I actually almost cried. We’re getting better. It’s a slow process.
I’m glad we can maybe work on this together. Beat this fucking demon that’s fucking shit up lol
Obi-Wan: Same with me man, married and have two daughters as well. I feel the same way - Can't believe I allowed myself to do something like this and just feels like its impossible to forgive myself for doing it to my wife and family. But I agree with you, its a slow process and thank god our wives are willing to work with us to get through it - Not many can say they have a wife that would stick around after something like this.
Dondonson: Similar experience as well - I was assaulted by my older cousin when I was about 5 and the issues just started from there, trying to find something that numbs the pain. And I feel you man - It's the worst feeling in this world, always feeling like a piece of shit and just when things start to feel somewhat back to normal you can tell the though crosses their mind and they just feel so betrayed - It's like the worst pit in your stomach that I am afraid will never actually go away.
Guys - you have no idea how much I appreciate your comments. I thought I would come on here and post to have no one reply. Hopefully we can all help each other bring ourselves up and get past this shit and be better men for it at the end of the day. Our ladies deserve better and we need to do it for them, our families, and ourselves.
Feel free to reach out to me whenever guys - Happy to share experiences or whatever might help!
I need to admit something else, I suffer from ED. So that was something that drove my porn further. I was trying to use porn to get me hard just to be able to finish by myself. But I feel like it may have made the ED worse by over exposing myself. And it just escalated further from there. Last night my wife and I finally had a very intimate night after almost a year of not being close at all,. but I couldn't completely preform. And I unhinged. I was so upset. I was looking forward to it all day. It’s extremely difficult to understand why she still wants to be with me even with these 2 problems. But she does.
I hope that wasn’t to much information, it’s just good to be able to talk to someone other than my wife about it.