It is possible but do you have any reason to not? How upfront is he with the problem? Does he use you for accountability? Allot of variables are involved

We didn't even know the words sex addiction until we got into counseling. He had a problem but didn't know there was a medical reason.
This weekend is the three year mark where I found out something and sadly it took about a year and a half later to get all of the info from him. He continued to protect himself by making me find everything out in bits and pieces.
I worry because I read on the internet that people to relapse. He is still struggling with ogling etc. He was living this awful life for 10 years of our marriage.
He has some issues he is dealing with from childhood etc.
I am reaching out because I wonder if it is possible for someone to change.
As the spouse of someone who has done all of this, it leaves us with great insecurity, suspicions and an inability to completely forget most of what we learn that our spouses have done. Don't forget, it may be a chemical thing but you still make the choice.

I know with my problems i had i strived to make my wife my accountability partner. I go to counseling and i share with her everything that is talked about that way she is aware. You need to have a sit down and put all your cards on the table. If he is truly clean, he shouldn't be afraid to discuss with you everything going on

Good Advice, thank you for your reply.

If you have to ask if an addict is clean. There not. You just know when they are. Just go home say let me hold your phone. If he hands it right over your good. If not. Well better call SAL!!!

That's a little presumptuous nevar. I only say this because for years i was asked if i was clean from drugs and I'm proud of my 18 years of sobriety. But i do agree with your second portion. If you have doubts just ask to see his device. If he fights he's hiding it

You have lots of options as the spouse of a sex addict. You can blindly accept that he is telling you the truth. My biggest piece of advice is to believe behaviors never his words. You say he still ogles? At 3 years sober that shouldnt be an issue if he lives his life with the 3 second rule. Does he give you reason to not trust him? lying about other things? breaking boundaries? not coming to bed? spending too much time online?

The last piece of advice is book a polygraph ...he will either willingly do it, or fight you on it then you will likely know before you even have to do a poly.

I have been thinking about suggesting a polygraph test. I did suggest this before and when I did a lot of information came out because he was afraid.
This was during the period that we found a good counselor but not all of the secrets were out. I still don't think he has opened up to me about everything and I think that is necessary as secrets are the devil.
As the spouse of a recovering sex addict I can assure you we are always looking over our shoulder. The damage that has been done to us as the spouse is unbelievable. I am really only in recovery with my H for maybe less than two years as it took along time for me to put the pieces together.
I still don't trust my H and I shouldn't at this phase of recovery. An addict is an addict. There are deep emotional problems he needs to work through
and so do I.
Thanks for responding!!! Every piece of advice or story is so helpful in recovery.

I am the spouse of a recovering sex/porn addict. He is 6 years sober. Part of our recovery was full disclosure followed by a poly with the option at any time i can request another poly. That is exactly how my husband disclosed all of the acting out, once i booked a poly and he was researching how to beat a poly , he finally realized in order to save our marriage and family he had to be totally honest. So after a week of trickle disclosure, After 2 years from discovery he finally told me everything. And 3 days later flew from canada to colorado to the Heart to Heart clinic and passed a poly. There is no way you can even begin to recover until you know ALL of it...maybe not details but at least all the acting out. If you think he hasnt fully told you everything chances are he hasnt. One thing about a spouse of an addict once we knew its like all our senses are opened. 6 years later i still dont fully trust my husband and i am okay with never fully trusting him EVER. He spent the first 22 years of our relationship lying and cheating...so 6 years is no time to regain the trust that has been broken. Relational betrayal is the worst type to heal from.

Amen