Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group

Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.

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GOClean 02/12/2020

Hello All. My name is George. I just joined. I need more support than my family can give me. I feel like they just don't understand what is going on in my life really.

It feels like I have always watched porn. And for most of my life I have felt it was a natural and normal way to express my desires.

But over the last few years my relationship has suffered badly. I have hurt my wife so badly. I made her feel like she wasn't enough - like she wasn't a wonderful, beautiful, and honestly sexy woman. She's a very social, affectionate, giving, and sexual woman and it hurt her as I pulled away from her in all areas of our life to focus more on porn than anything else.

I couldn't even talk to her about my day or my friends. We stopped going out. We stopped being intimate.

I even stopped having friends.

It has gotten worse over the last 3 years but really bad over this last year. She has been so sad this last year because I have zero emotional, physical, or sexual interest in her. She cries and begs me for attention and affection. Lately she has said things like "something has to change" and she "can't live like this anymore".

So I have been forcing myself to talk to her, cuddle with her, and have sexual interactions with her. But all I want is to be left alone so I can watch porn and she can feel the strain.

I can't even sexually perform with her. She is just not what I am interested in. I haven't been able to achieve a completion with her in about a year.

All I can focus on is the porn. All types of porn. Any porn.

I get up in the middle of the night to watch. I watch during my drive to work. I watch at work. I watch on my drive home.

I feel like this is the tipping point and I really need support.

Thanks for reading - George

arthas2000 02/12/2020

Hi George, I wish you the best of luck in your journey! Maybe your family don't understand the situation you're in. If it's the case, you could try to give them a better understanding of your situation. I am sure that they wanna help and that they would be sad not to. You need every support you can get and your family is surely a good source of it! The relationship that a men as with his wife is, to my point of view, very precious. I hope that you know that something very special. Myself, I'm not with someone, but I want to and I'm afraid that if I keep watching pornography I will never be. It's one of my maine motivations to keep this bad habit away from me. Find your motivations and write them down. It will give you a new direction to rely on. I've started my present streak yesterday, I hope that we can follow each other and never give up! Hoping I could help!Ps: sorry if my english is bad, it's not my maine language and I don't use it very often.

GOClean 02/12/2020

Thank you Arthas - I am working on goals and motivations.

It is hard because my wife has always been so understanding of my need for porn. I know she doesn't understand my compulsions and addictions the way I need her to. She just doesn't understand the need like other porn addicts do.

She has supported me fully for years but I know the compulsion is getting worse and that's what brought me here.

Blacksheep59 02/25/2020

Porn is an addiction just like alcohol or drugs. you need to see an Addiction counselor, I would also suggest a marriage counselor for you and your wife. I would also suggest some kind of internet filter like Net Nanny. there are also some that will send an alert to an accountability partner you set up, It is a good idea to have an accountability partner. just like in AA you have a sponsor you can talk to when you feel like a drink, same thing with your accountability partner. Stay strong my friend, this can be beat.

Fanos64 02/27/2020

I would say you have a severe addiction and not only need a therapist who specializes in this area (and a good one) but also to join sex addiction groups. SA groups have all kinds of sex related issues in them, including excessive pornography usage. What I'm reading is not uncommon for someone addicted to porn.

Groups are great because you can make friends and connect to people who are struggling with similar issues. They give wonderful advice and help you see past the problem. Quitting porn is similar to climbing a mountain. It's ONE step at a time, if you look up, you'll freak out about how far away the peak is, if you look down/back you will freak out about your past and falling. The ability to focus solely on the trail in front of your face is called living in the present and is difficult to accomplish especially with an addiction, but it is absolutely possible!

You have to take this thing one urge at a time, each time you push porn and the urge out of your mind, you grow stronger. You take it each minute at a time an ON day at a time. Having a sponsor from a SA group will work wonders. Groups help you open up and overcome your shame. Shame is a driving FORCE behind mot addictions and especially ones related to sex. I struggle with the same stuff so I know what it's like...luckily I don't have a wife and kids, but mine has led to an unproductive career and a LOT of wasted time...

Anyways PM me if you have questions or want to talk more!

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