do you attend 12 step? have a sponsor? Yep you are right porn changes the way you think sex really is. It actually is the leading cause of ED for young men. An accountability person is a good idea for sure and a big part of the 12 step program but in the end only you can hold yourself accountable. What are you willing to do to be in recovery and stay sober ?

I struggle to with internet porn and try not to have near at night for it is a real temptation to medicate and escape reality. Ancient Faith Radio Podcast on Addictions is very informative and helpful. May we all find Grace and Peace of God that surpasses all comprehension beyond discursive logic. Honesty, Open-mindedness, and Willingness to go to any length to remain sober are something I really need along with good support group. And try not to set myself up for failure. Finding true intimacy, love and compassion.

I feel with you

I’m having these problems

Is there any online 12 step program

Hmm...I will give those all a try. And unfortunately to answer candycin's question, I don't know if I am willing to stop. But I want to "be willing", if that makes any sense?

I don't know...I just need something to break through.

But thank you for all of your support. And please dont hesitate to friend me or pm me for accountability. God knows I need it....

Its an addiction and the worse one to break but in order to be successful you have to want to be willing and do whatever it takes... Anotherguy there are phone in 12 step meetings you can use but in person is the best. The first meeting will be hard but everyone in the room is an addict in different stages of recovery.

I need to get back on track. I was in a 12 step program. But started missing meetings and thought that I could do it on my own. I use the rtribe app to hold myself accountable but still find myself tempted to look at porn at times

What kind of app is that?

When your schedule gets busy enough trust me you wont have time for porn.Your just in Horny Toad Mode.
It sometimes passes It sometimes gets put on the backburner when you have a girl, It may
just get boring because the movie gets played out. I mean- I want to say I grew up with
brothers and they all did it- Wed find the tapes- sooo funny-their friends did it. Guys I knew did it?
Some can handle it and phase it out like its no biggie, When it does affect your other responsibilities
in life yes take action get help- but like it is sometimes a phase unless like your in your 60's and your
a porn addict.

Truly if you seek purity- then tell the Universe to assist you in reaching this goal- which means
cold turkey- throw away the tapes- disconnect the porn sites or the internet.The Universe will see that
you are serious and will guide you- but you have to honestly put it all out there in the backyard and Burn It

You will get it- This too shall pass.

Hi Jiga,

I just wrote this response to another brother but I'll modify it slightly for you. I hope you find value in it.

I can relate to your currently struggle. When I came to the Lord as an older teenager I was able to talk about my drug and alcohol additions much easier than my struggle with lust. With nobody open to talk with me about it, I felt shame and kept to myself. It grew larger when there was no light. That went on for until my mid 30s. I started working recovery in 12 steps 8-10 years ago. I've read maybe a hundred books on the subject, including academic research. Before recovery I couldn't go more than a few days without acting out. With God's help I was able to make it almost 5 years clean and sober - no porn no masturbation. I found there are different tools that worked well at different times in my journey. For some men, pressure from the wife is a big motivator for them. It was for me, for a while (2-3 years) but that eventually went away and I greatly struggled because I didn't have a motivator (similar to how when I was in school I did homework because somebody was driving it, but after school was out I wasn't doing any homework). Likewise, I had to decide I was going to do it for me and my relationship with God. I kept going to recovery meetings but they stopped working for me and I eventually stopped going after a couple years of showing up every week to say I've acted out again. I use to get help from therapists but that didn't help me either. They would go through worldly wisdom books like Recovery Zone and Out of the Shadows but that approach is all so clinical and void of God's power in my experience. I gave up on the them. My current approach is less legalistic (careful for this trigger and careful for that trigger) to the point they are wearing a blindfold to walk around. There are some people I know who do well with this approach but I don't think that approach is the answer although having some level of avoiding input is obvious (movies with provocative scenes, etc.). What is currently working for me fasting and praying. It sounds strange but think of it this way... would you think about acting out if you suddenly couldn't breath? How about if you were in a desert and had no water... would you even care if a trigger was there and you had nothing to drink for a couple days? I'm assuming you would have to answer no to these questions - I'm not suggesting to stop breathing or drinking but likewise, if you stop eating food... remarkable the sexual desire is completely gone. Then if you add in prayer, praise and worship, bible reading, church services, suddenly your whole mindset on life starts to shift dramatically and you could care less about a trigger. The hardest part about stopping acting out is the first 30-40 days (a juice fast or Daniel's fast might be a consideration) after that initial time is downhill if you're putting in 30-60 minutes a day recovery type reading/writing and calling a mentor daily or doing some kind of daily check in with another brother to keep current... talk about any second looks, resentments, etc. I feel like this might be more than what you're asking for but I hope you can find something in my response that will be encouraging to you. I can share more about fasting if you'd like. I have come to believe that a huge part of this fight is a spiritual fight (more than clinical) where the enemy has a stronghold just like you find in Matt. 17 where Jesus casted out a demon and the disciples asked why they could not cast it out, Jesus responded, "But this kind does not go out but by prayer and fasting." There are some great books on fasting/prayer but it's always a good idea to talk with you doctor first if you have any medical conditions. Hope something in here helps:)

Hi Jiga,

I just started a Fasting support group on this site if you'd like to join it. It would a way to buddy up with myself or somebody else if you'd like to go on the fasting journey together. It's pretty cool. Search - fasting to bring it up.

I think its great that you see this has become a problem. My husbands is addicted to porn but lies about it to my face. So im glad that you have realized its a problem before you get into a relationship. Theres nothing wrong with you. Its just so easy to find. Its every where. I pray god can give you the strength to over come it. Again good for you, and good luck.

Porn and acting out sexually IS ADDICTIVE that is reason enough to quit. Unfortunately it's also why it's so hard to quit. How convenient!!! I have come to accept this after many years of rationalizing that I can take a peek here and there at some porn, but it always leads to the same result. i start taking my clothes off and then i either masturbate or worse. I wish I never would have started down this road but it;s too late. it's not too late however to get off the road. The devil is a F-----ing liar and society is too. Porn is not just fun it is addictive and will take you to hell with it. Stop turn to Jesus pretend he is in the room with you. I told my counselor that for now if I have to I will just masturbate once a week to get any porn or urges to act out out of my system. I hope to grow enough to get rid of that too in time. Real sex with a partner in a relationship is by far the best. I know, I've been married for a long time. The best times of my life are when there is just us and porn is not in my life. Trust me, find a girlfriend who is sweet, treat her right give her gifts and have a good sex life with her. You will be happy. Porn is for losers like Satan. Who is he married to??????