Hi Jstock21,

I can relate to your story. I would encourage you to find local in person group like Celebrate Recovery, SA, or SLA. Ask for a sponsor and go the meetings every week. Your sponsor will give you guidance on how to work the steps. The problem is that you're trying to do something on your own strength that you are not able to do on your own, which is what insanity is... trying to do something over and over with the same approach and expecting a different result. On my own I got a few weeks at best like you, with God's help I've been free for 5 years and countless others have as well. You'll need to come to a place where you say, I can't do this alone, I need your help God, and I'm willing to do whatever you would have me do. Until we get to this point, it's next to impossible to get out of the quicksand of lust from my experience. You can also go to a local church and tell a pastor about it and that you're needing prayer. Here is a saying we have -> Without God I can't and without me God won't. God speed!

Thank you CJ..I appreciate you commenting and giving me some advice. I have thought about going to somewhere for help before but I’m too ashamed to go through with it. I guess it’s time to actually seek someone and get help as well as starting talking to God.

I can relate to that. When I went to my first meeting was scared to death and felt so ashamed. I didn't talk to anybody the first time or two but soon it was like going to anything else. In fact, I feel safer at those meetings than any other place anymore because it's like we all fell in the ocean and we all need each other to get out and I've never heard people be so honest in my entire life. You can take it at you're own pace too... you can go and just listen in if you want. Often times they make is super easy and comfortable for new comers. They will normally have a side meeting with just you and 2 other people who will share their story and tell you about the program. Normally, you walk away feeling 1000 pounds lighter and hope for the first time in adult life.

Do you know of any good websites I can visit to find some of those places? I’m ready to make those changes. I need to get this off my chest and get a clear conscience.

Check here to find a local CR group https://locator.crgroups.info/
You can do it bro. Push through any fear that comes up. Ask God to help you make it to a meeting. He can help with stuff like that.

Don’t ever feel ashamed. Its like an alcoholic or drug addict. Its an addiction and you didnt plan it. You can do it, do it for yourself.

a 12 step is the best place to start...everyone that attends will be in the same situation as you. Getting support from a sponsor, hearing other addicts struggles and recovery is the best. Meetings are free, not sure where you live but i am sure there is a 12 step somewhere. Online help is okay but there can be lots of triggers, etc so not the best place to start.

Did you find a local group yet? There's nothing wrong with connecting online as a supplement. You will have to be the judge at what's triggering for you and you'll need to develop lightening reactions to turn your head no matter where you are at... triggers are everywhere including our own heads when nobody else is around. We carry the drug with us unlike all other addictions. What's most important is that connect with people. If online is all you can connect with at this time, then by all means keep connecting online until you get the courage to try an in person group. It's too easy to become isolated with this issue... don't let that happen. It's tempting to want to bypass real intimacy for what appears to be the magic. Real intimacy however is coming out and sharing your hardship and being real with another person. You're doing a great job... keep it up bro! I believe in you!

Hi
An ex boyfriend of mine was addicted to porn. I would watch it with him to see what the big deal was. It got very boring after the second one. I told him that. You can tell these people are not really enjoying it.
Your getting married your young do you think this kind of sex is going to please your new wife to be??? I hope not. Connection and passion is what make sex exiting. And your partner will be able to climax. In porn they are faking it. Faking there orgasms. In porn they need what you call fluffers to get the men excited in order to have sex with the women or whomever. My friend made a few porn movies. Just my opinion. I also am not trying to hurt your feelings. I know you love this person because your going to marry her.

Hello all, it’s been a while since I’ve been on here. I’m happy to say I’ve been clean for a little under 2 months now. That you all for thinking of me and helping through it. My fiancée and I are happier than ever and we’re currently in the process of planning our wedding for next September, again, thank you all for your words of encouragement.

@jstock21 Porn addiction is really dangerous..porn addiction destroys your brain.. it really affects your relationships..or even it can lead to sexual dysfunctions..there's a website and community forum called "nofap.com" that serves as a support group for people who wish to avoid pornography and masturbation....there are a lot of people like you...hope it will help you.