I never shared this to anyone before, and I hope anyone can relate to what I have to say. I've been on porn ever since I was 14 and ever since then, slowly but surely, my life has taken a very dark turn. Now I'm 24 and I can't just stop myself. And I'm in pain everytime I masturbate. I have zero friends. I have noone to love me and accept me. Atleast until now. I know that what I'm about to say next is absurd but I want to just get it out of my chest. Lately, there's this YouTube video essay on the new Batman movie made by a channel called StoryStreet. And at the end of the video, it says this, "Bruce isn't healed, but he's finally in a place where he can begin to heal. Because there has to be a beginning. A moment where u reach out a caring hand not only to others but yourself. A moment where you tell yourself that your pain is real and you don't deserve it." I don't know about u guys but that hit me like aton of goddamn pricks. But what stuck to me the most is when the video said that you've paid enough and that your pain is real. I've never been told this before because I didn't know that before. I knew before that I was in pain but I never aknowledged it or even gave it voice because of the fact that I'm a young adult male and I live in a world and a culture where everyone says to hide your pain away and to never cry or share your feelings with anyone ever otherwise you might look weak or pity. But then when this video said that I paid enough and that my pain is real and I have the power to heal. I felt that. Even though I don't know where to start to heal. But I want to start healing. I want to heal.