Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group

Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.

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/ Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group

Husbands porn addiction

margesimpson66
margesimpson66

Hi everyone hope you are all doin ok . I discovered my hubby of 27 years had been holding a secret all through are time together . He's addicted to porn ! Am totally deverstated and in disbelief as we had such a loving marriage great sex and 4 beautiful children . I have suffered depression last 4-5 years an he's been a marvellous husband taking care of me an the kids . I just can't get my head round why he needs to do this ur could of told me sooner . It's making me go down hi fast with my mental health an it's effecting our kids too . Our relationship did suffer an now I know why he was so distant at times . Now he's promised he has giving the porn up for good . But he's wanting me more , not a problem as I adore my husband. But is this the right thing for us to do have so much sex ? I mean it's gone from 2-3 times a week to twice a day . Am just afraid it's not helping his recovery by doin this . Am also afraid if I say no to sex he will result back to porn. He is saying he wants me even more because he has realised what he almost lost . Am trying to help him as him viewing oorn has made me feel so awful about myself, am not eating or sleeping properly. Plz help !!!

mm1876
mm1876
I don’t know if it helps but as someone who has struggled with this I think it is highly likely that this issue existed way before you met him. It is wounds of some nature from youth
For me the live I have for my wife exists on a whole different “positive” level
BUT porn and such compulsions eat away at a persons ability to fully love So victory is needed over time. God Bless
margesimpson66
margesimpson66
Thank u for ur kind reply
AJM10
AJM10
I am in your exact position, would you be willing to exchange numbers or other communication ways to talk? I am struggling.
Mk1
Mk1
Every situation and relationship is different, but in my opinion there's definitely a difference between coming back from cheating on you to dealing with a porn addiction. Since this seems like just a porn addiction, I would say your relationship is still pretty sound. Remember, it's an addiction and so it doesn't necessarily have anything to do with how good it bad your relationship is. It's kind of separate. Could one affect the other, of course, but they are still independent from each other.
Now, as part of handling any addiction, you typically need some kind of replacement behavior. So, if more sex is the replacement, and you're okay with it, then enjoy!! If you're not okay with it, then that's a different ball game.
Even if you are okay with it, while this is a start, it's not the end of the battle. He will still need continue to work on it, and find other potential replacement behaviors and perhaps even therapy. Your support will help, but don't feel pressured or forced into anything.
Sodefeated
Sodefeated
I understand not being able to wrap your head around it. I recently found out my husband of 26 years has been downloading nudes of women and paying for sex our whole marriage. I'm sorry you have to go through this as I do. I feel like my whole life was a lie. He to claims to love me but he won't admit he has a problem. I don't know how to help you at this time cause I don't know how to help myself at this point. Very new to me just found out about a month ago. But just know I know that there are people out there going through the same thing. You are not alone.