bremner,

I am glad you have realized the devastating effects of porn. Now there is indeed help, now that you have taken the first step, there is an online site for recovery called Recovery Nation, it's free but in order for it to work, you have to do the homework they give you.

There is also called : Your brain on Porn where you can find other helpful information on recovery tips and other helpful information.

I have been sober for a year and a few months after having been addicted for decades, I am also in my fifties, so in short, you too can overcome this nasty addiction.

Let me know if you need any help, we are here to support each other.

Best of luck,
Wolf

thanks for the reply and yes i will keep in touch but just wondering i just feel that my self esteem is so low and have to find out how to love my self and respect my self i am so down right now .......Brem

Hey Brem, I'm on day 26 of my recovery. Low self esteem and low view of yourself is a normal bi-product of sexual addiction. The recovery nation program works with these issues as well since they are all a part of the bigger picture. Sexual addiction is a much larger beast than it appears to be on the surface. There is a lot more to it than simply "being addicted to sex". Recovery Nation should help explain all that is involved. As you work through the program you'll begin to see a big change in not only how you feel about yourself but how you handle life in general. You will become more confident, you will believe in yourself more, you will begin to feel more comfortable with yourself, etc. I've only been following the program for 26 days and I'm already starting to see a big difference in myself.

At any rate I know you can do it. Wolf and I are here to help.

Bremner,

Albert said it extremely well, I cannot add anything save to remind you that Albert and I are here for you.

Wolf

Thanks guys that is inspiring and i was on the site recovery nation and can find the steps i should be taking can you clue me in thanks...Brem

Hey Brem...so go to www.recoverynation.com, when you're there hover your mouse curser over the 'Recovery' menu item at the top of the screen. When you do this a menu should drop down. In the menu find "The Recovery Workshop" and click on it. Once you are there start going through the lessons by clicking each one. There will be instructions and assignments in each lesson. Sometimes it will tell you to go to your recovery thread or other tools the website offers. I personally just created a word document and saved my homework assignments on my own personal computer. You can do it however you feel most comfortable.

Thanks Albert i will do that and let you know how its going......Brem

So tell is it true that just reading all the testimony's on here and just feeling so down about your self be a good healer cause i haven't had the urge to do nothing because every time i read something on here i just get turned off about myself and making love to my wife is so so so genuine then before.We all ways say there's nothing wrong with me what are you talking about till you read stuff on here and you think there talking about you man o man its like looking at a hot burner and saying to your self should i or should i not touch it.....Dah i think not because if you did you would be in pain

Brem,

Can you rephrase your question because I think something got lost in the translation? Or maybe I'm reading it wrong?

Thanks,
Wolf

i am sorry that i babel but wolf i just feel that the guilt in me takes me so fare away from all the shit and was just wondering if guilt is some what a healer and reading other people testimony's makes me think that there talking about me there identical,it makes me think im looking in a mirror that just makes me feel gross about my self.Ihope that is more clear...........Brem

Brem,

Thank you for the clarification. Now it makes more sense, before it was simply what I often call stream of consciousness where only the writer knows what he's saying, in a matter of speaking. I had the original gist but I wanted to be sure that's what it was before I ventured an opinion.

But I digress, to begin with, feeling guilty, like crap and with low self esteem will get you nowhere, in fact, it will sink you lower and if gone unchecked it can lead you back instead of, away from porn.

So you made mistakes, you made poor choices, you are not alone.What you need to look at is what you are not doing anymore, instead of what you've done. The past is done, nothing you can do to change that, what you can change is the now.

Another thing that is extremely important is that not two recovery techniques are the same, not two people in recovery are the same, so comparison is useless. Thus, keep yourself on your own recovery program and trust me that's more than enough on your particular plate.

In short, look at what's ahead of you, join Recovery Nation, do the exercises and ask questions here if need be. Albert and I will be more than happy to help.

Stay positive,
Wolf

im telling you i am having a good day feeling free and it feels good to talk to you guys on here its bin 4 weeks now and the mind is free thanks.........brem

Brem,

I am glad to hear that you have been able to refrain from indulging for 1 month, l am very proud of you.

Just make sure you have made contingency plans for triggers, temptations and any other recovery enemies as I call them.

We are here for you... Albert and I.. that is..

Keep up the good work,
Wolf

Good after noon gents just a little advise just to see what you did in the past ........If you walk in a room and you see a beautiful woman,what do you do look away because i know what i would do before but now every thing is new now i have a good friend give me advise but like to see what you guys have to say........brem

Brem,

What would I do if I walked into a room and there is a beautiful woman there? If she is looking at my direction,. I'd simply wave at her and if she does not wave back, I'd go on about my business, no harm done.

Her either noticing me or not would have nothing to do with how I see or feel about myself because my self esteem would be intact.

Wolf