Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group
Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.
This is my first time posting, i am 19 years old and have been watching porn since I was about 9 or 10. When I first started it was random and I didn't know what I was doing, I just knew it felt good, as the years started progressing so did my urge to watch porn. When I was probably 12 or 13 I started watching porn probably 20-35 times weekly and I didn't know that I was doing such a bad thing until I got caught by my parents. When they found out they were disappointed to say the least, but I didn't share with them how bad of a problem I had because once I again I didn't know it was a problem. I started realizing it was an actual problem in my first relationship my sophomore year of high school when I became sexually active and I started becoming ashamed of myself every time I would watch and with how I felt I had to hide it from my partner. I confided in her and told her that I would stop, but nothing changed ultimately after a couple of days and I couldn't muster the strength to tell her I failed to quit yet again. Now moving on to my current relationship my freshman year of college i confided in my partner after 9 months that I still have a problem watching porn and that I've done so throughout my relationship. After confiding in her however I was able to restrain myself quite a bit. I tried to only watch censored videos or pictures, but I still look at these very frequently and I don't feel right about doing it. Today however I did watch porn and I feel very miserable because I feel like I'm just starting over again and that I'll never get over this. I want to be able to be clean from porn before I confide in my partner again because I am too ashamed to come forth before I'm at that level of self control.
1. seeing a certified sex addiction therapist
2. attending 12 step meetings for sex/porn addiction
3. limiting access to the internet (i know addicts that had to go back to basic flip phones while in the early stages of recovery) or use internet in a public place (coffee shop) or only when with your girlfriend
4. make a list of healthy outlets and do them daily. cooking, exercise, reading,
going for a walk.
5. journal
6. mediatate
7. make sure you avoid the classic triggers...HALT...are you hungry?angry? Lonely? Tired?
8. talk to your girlfriend, 100 percent transparency is key to success..this addiction hides in secrets and lies
9. wear an elastic band on your wrist..snap it when you find yourself starting to think about porn etc. After a while your brain will start to feel discomfort from those thoughts of acting out
10. check out the website yourbrainonporn.com it shows you the actual damage you are doing to your brain by watching porn, it changes the wiring
I am not an addict, but a spouse of an addict in recovery. I can tell you from my side of the story his addiction ruined so much of his life. He wasted so much time acting out that he failed to develop solid relationships with his children, he had to be restricted at work and lost out on promotions, he nearly destroyed our marriage. His porn addiction esculated over a 22 year period and got worse and worse types of acting out. I caught him on several (over 100) sex dating sites with profiles, chatting with women online, strip clubs with hands on, webcam sex.sending naked pictures,making out with strangers in bars. After i discovered it all, he attended therapy, did polygraphs after full disclosure, attended a 21 day in patient rehab, He still attends SAA meetings, and is now 6 years sober with NO slips or relapses.