well welcome jabaroo hope we can help

your right everything is a mess...got to dig out of it somehow...it just feels like everything is flat---there's no other way but out of this.i just have to fight.

Thanks Reckman. Skavenger, I wish you well, making the comittment to end this seems to be challenging. For the sake of sanity i'm trying again.

Jabaroo,

Sadly, the only way to change your life is through enrolling in a recovery program. There is no trying, there is only doing.

There are several available, such as recovery nation or a 12 step program. Nevertheless, you need to realize that your mental health and how you choose to life your life has to matter to you enough to seek recovery from this addiction.

My mother used to say, "Don't tell me you are sorry. Show me how remorseful you are by your actions." I never forgot that because it is true, we can say how badly we feel but only through rectifying our behavior can we move forward towards eradication of those pesky behaviors that are not part of who we are.

In other words, make yourself and your recovery a priority in your life, join a recovery program so you can life a life you can be proud of, devoid of shame, guilt and remorse, which incidentally are the very things that are keeping you enslaved to your addiction.

Hugs,
Wolf

Thank you andre420

Wolf, Thanks for being there. I'm a pro at setting myself up to fail haha. Please forgive me for that. TTYL friend..

Thanks!
Jabaroo