Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group
Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.
Hello everyone,
My name is Josh, and I'm a college student, currently studying (and procrastinating) my way towards a B.A.S. degree. To put it simply, I've been addicted to softcore and hardcore pornography for over 12 years, since I was in the 5th or 6th grade.
About 7 years ago, I realized how warped and distorted my sexuality had become and ever since I've been trying to quit this perverse, distructive habit. Despite 2 suicide attempts, various accountability partners, and a loving, caring family; I'm still stuck in this addictive cycle of porn-watching and excessive masterbation...
In the past I've managed about a year's time relatively clean...but still here I am, having relapsed more times than I can remember at this point and weekly (if not daily) surfing the web for pornographic images.
In a way, I hope that joining this support group will help me to find healthier, and less destructive ways of coping with my insecurities, rather than turning to pornography to dull the stress or discontentment I have with life.
I also learned how pornography use adversly affects the mind as well as it does relationships. I practically butchered my past relationships and broke the heart of a very loving and good-natured girlfriend as well as dissapointed another. I have a faithful, squad of brothers at my church who love me and root for me...so, I can't even look at them in the eyes whenever we meet and talk about our week.
Most of all, I hate myself...often feeling like such a failure and so inadequate before God. The Good Lord has always been good to me, and has kept me from trouble despite the many times I've indulged in porn. Much of the time, I feel so insignificant...how can I face a loving and righteous God when I am such an unworthy shell-of-a-man?
Though I confess everything to Him, and to others, I'm still failing; still disgracing and shaming myself; still masterbating in the middle of the night to a blue screen of a keyboard fantasy.
I'm tired of my brackish heart, my weak-minded excuses, and the nagging pangs of regret that ALWAYS follow.
"I am the shit of the earth." Is something I tend to believe more than my faith.
Anyway, so here I am...typing out this rambling post n the midst of a porn addiction.
So please, if there is anyone out there I humbly ask for help...and maybe a prayer as well.
Sincerely,
Jiga
I have come to realize that sex addiction and porn is a symptom of an underlying problem. Usually something in childhood. Check out the book No More Mr Nice Guy by Dr Robert Glover (it's not what it sounds like ). I don't agree with everything in this book but it has helped me to pinpoint the underlying problem of my addiction. Hope this helps.
And don't give up on the help from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3,4
Also I ask that you consider Luke 8:43-48 When you read it replace the woman with a flow of blood of 12 years in the account with yourself and your trials, namely porn. It may help your heart to realize how much Jesus and God cares for you and wants to help you heal.
We are hear for you brother hang in there.