Once again, I am finding myself feeling so lost and incredibly lonely. While I do pride myself on opening up and getting others to do the same, I realize that everything happens for a reason and often we do cross each others paths and help each other along the way. I just recently heard a kind farewell from another I had grown very close to (even though he too is far far away)  Happily he now has more confidence and has gotten his drive and desire back and has come to see he can have more. He has found someone closeby and the two of them will do well for each other. 

This brings me back to others that I have spoken with in the past. I grow close and get to know them and we seem to help each other understand and realize we deserve and want more. I am always happy for another who does seem to find someone or something that fills that void and does contribute to their happiness. I am a little sad to see others move on . (brings me back to inevitably being alone and forgotten... or feeling that way)

I cannot tell you how I do dread coming home to any empty house, cooking for just myself and retreating into an empty bed. I would so love to be wanted. Add to the mix that I have been watching and rewatching some good steamy (as well as a few uplifting but always happy ending) movies, plus seeing couples everywhere, smacks me in the face with my loneliness.

What I would not give for someone to welcome me home... sneaking up from behind, wrapping arms around me and kissing the side of my neck. Passionate kisses, affectionate nuzzles, touching, exploring and simply having the occasional urge or desire to do so would be incredible. What I would not give for a caring, sexy, man who is not afraid to share all that is on his mind (and allow me to do the same.) To me there is nothing better than for two people to be and accept each other just as they are. (good, bad and naughty....flaws and all )

Yes my mind is back to the missing sex on the brain.