my husband of 9 years molested my niece and i cant stop thinking about the sitiuation. im having nightmares and i cant sleep. his court date is not set yet and the divorce is pending due to the investigation still being open. any advice would be great. im not sure how to deal with this as none of my family and friends will talk to me about it. not that they arent supportive they just dont understand and cant put themselves in my shoes

im still in shock because up until 2 years ago he was the model citizen and a perfect role model for my nieces and nephew. then everything went to shit. he started treating me like i was infected with a disease and wouldnt touch me even to hug me. i had a clue that he was probably cheating on me when he cut my debit card up after he told me to go get grocery and food stuffs. we lived with my mom in law and brother in law and his wife and 3 kids. he would say he was just teaching her how to live a good life and said he was showing her pricing skills and money skills. she is autistic but very smart with numbers. and he took advantage of it. he had me believing i was crazy and had me going to a shrink....who says he never thought i had scizophrenia in the first place. he said he was trying to be a good father figure to her since, her father. not having custody of her but living with us. would never have anything to do with her.

im tired of this looping in my head. the whole family i was living with thinks i knew this was going on....and im as much as a victim as they are. even more so because i found out he was poisioning me. doctors cant prove it but i was going to a cancer center for treatment because my white blood cell count was over 10 at a 16.5 and my red blood cell count was low. she was never testing for poisioning because we had no clue that my husband was a pediphile at the time. i was a heavy wine drinker and for a year would drink a glass of wine every night. i didnt grow suspicious of him poisioning me till my cancer specialist brought it up. she asked me if he had accesses to my wine. and i said yes. then come to think of it i would throw up after having a glass.not imedatly but....you get the idea. with all this going on...my mother in law who has rights to the car that she helped him buy in her name wants it back. i am blessed to have a brother that is willing to give me his paid off car and get a new one for himself.  i had a seasonal job but they didnt tell me it was seasonal till they let me "go". i was told it was part time. so now im looking for a full time job while applying for grants to go back to school. because he had me believing i never needed a job or school. hes such a minipulative bastard. meanwhile waiting for the court date and helping the detective in any way i can. while the divorce is pending....its just stress ontop of stress on top of depression.

and i feel like im drowning. im seeing a therapist but its bi-weekly. i need someone who understands where im coming from and the support of other women.