I'm not sure if I'm looking for advice your just a place to talk about this but after his arrest for CP, I've decided file for divorce. For our entire marriage I've been the primary earner, I'm not happy about it but I get the nessesity of split assets 50/50, bank accounts, retirement, ect. The only place where I didn't think we should do that was the house. We bought the house about three years ago and because of the current state of the market there is ALOT of equity built up, originally he said he'd let me keep it but now it looks like he's changing his mind. This just doesn't feel right. I'd either have to take out a huge loan at a much higher interest rate to pay him off or I have to sell the home and significantly down grade. While he gets to keep his half of the money and live with his parents until he's ready to buy I have to turn around a figure out how/where me and our 4 children are going to live. I work remotely and him doing this might push me to move out of state closer to my family where I'd have help with the kids and living cost are much lower. He wouldn't be able to visit the kids out of state, I want to explain this to him but I don't want it to seem like I'm leveraging the children for money. I'm not sure what's fair in this case but I definitely feel like he has the advantage.

Overall I just feel very used. I feel like he has just been taking from for the whole 11 years of marriage and even after we divorce he's going to just keep taking from me, it's never going to be over. It's always said that divorce is never because of one party but I do feel like this is all his fault.