Sex Offender in My Life Community Group

This is a NONJUDGEMENTAL group for people who have a registered sex offender in their life. Whether you support this person, are angry, hurt, scared or have accepted the situation, we are here for you. This group is for the day to day trials and tribulations of living with a RSO in their family or having one as a friend. FORGIVENESS DOES NOT MEAN FORGETTING!

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My father is a child predator

Faithnhope
Faithnhope

Over the summer my father decided to tell my siblings and myself that 17 years ago he started a relationship with a student he was mentoring(this child was 16). 2 of my brothers and brother in law along with my sister and 2 sister in laws are mandated reporters. Our entire world has come crashing down. He is now being investigated by the school district and could possibly lose everything. NYS has recently passed a childs victim act with allows victims to file lawsuits. I am not sure how much longer I can try to be a supportive daughter while I am appalled by what he did. I am not sure how much more I can take

broken1003
broken1003
Bless your heart hun. You aren’t alone. Seek counseling if you havent.
mbolte
mbolte
I am a mother to a son that violated our daughter 17 years ago which we reported. We still love him. We also knew he needed to serve the consequences of his actions. I know it's different with your dad being an adult however it's still a family dynamic. Due to our state our son serviced 17 years for a crime he committed at 14 and we fought for years to finally get him released. The process left me depressed and feeling alone. I am sure your dad feels the same way. All you can do is love him if that's what you want to do. We stood behind our son no matter how hard it was because at the end of the day we knew we were all he had. Others will always look at him as a sex offender but to us he is still our child and we still love him. Agreed with the first persons statement seek counseling. We have utilized our counselor countless times over the last 17 years.
Faithnhope
Faithnhope
Wow you have been through a lot. Your strength is amazing! I was willing to stand by when I only knew of the one student. However so much more has come out and he is a very sick person. Two of his brothers are standing by his side, my siblings and I have decided not to have a relationship with him.at this time. He has admitted to being attracted to young boys and being "turned on" by students. He no longer teaches or is allowed to be involved with boy scouts so the lack of accessible children triggered his " breakdown". I tried very hard to be there for him but I just cant. He constantly lies and manipulates people. I just cant believe this is the same man who raised me. He really put on such an act my whole life. I will make it though. Hugs to you for being so strong
jferdig732
jferdig732
I do realize this post is a year old, but I have something to offer if you are still in the similar situation
. I am not defending your fathers actions, I can not speak to them or anything about them.
What I would like you to consider is your own statement of " I cant believe this is the same man who raised me" I am sure he was not acting when It came to you, see we are all capable of both good and bad. He did some very VERY bad things I am sure, AND he did some good things. He loved you, he provided, your DAD was not the same person he was when doing those things, I can tell you this because I have done some bad things. I am a registered person because of the pictures I downloaded off the internet among other digit crimes. After years of therapy and suicide idealization, attempts I finally learned yes I was the person who did those things AND I raised my children to be respectful and hard working. I taught them love. My family had no idea of what I was doing so it wasn't until I got caught that my behavior affected them. It did affect them and things changed. Years later I can say my behaviors were of 2 different places in me. Just remember who he was to you, the rest can be worked out.