I know exactly how you feel. I have no money either and it sucks. I just wanted to tell you I care. Gentle hugs to you.

I understand completely. I haven't been able to work since July 2010. And my disability hearing still hasn't been set. All of this time my mother has been supporting me. Otherwise I would be out on the streets.

It is so nice to meet you! Not only do I find you honest, I find you kind, caring, and smart. Thank you for joining us on this board. You will find compassionate, loving people here. (((hugs)))

thank you all for your kind words

I have felt and do feel exactly the same as you do on a lot of things. This is a hard, cold world where those of us who struggle with mental illness have a really rough time. If it weren't for my meager disability and the blessed fact that my wife can work we would be in a world of hurt because I struggle with doing simple things around the house most days and wonder if I will ever be able to work again. As it is we are barely getting by financially. I used to be real smart but years of drug abuse have destroyed a great deal of my mind. Complex things just baffle me and I am a lost cause when it comes to our computer focused world. I can relate.
It takes a real effort but in order to keep our sanity we have to do our best to look for the good in this world, at least that is what my wife always tells me. The night sky is mostly black but there are points of light in it that give it beauty. There are points of light in this dark world as well, this is not hell. (Although it feels that way a lot to me!)
I am so glad you joined our group. You will find some really good people here who are each heroes and incredible survivors. In spite of their own pain they consistently show love and concern for others. Welcome home. We can each relate to your feelings of hating yourself.
I have known you for some time and you have become very precious to me. I know you to be a very kind, sensitive, honest, hard working, and sweet person and I pray for you and think about you often. I look on your heart, not on your external "defects" or lack of status, and what I see there is bright and beautiful indeed. I would do anything to help you and I get very sad for you when you struggle. You are a gem and I hope someday you will see that about yourself. You have a good heart and this world needs more real people such as yourself. I hope you stick around and make friends here. Above all I pray you will find relief from the hell that is self hate. You deserve happiness and love and I am sending you light and hope and hugs. Again, thanks for joining!