Resurrection After Rape Community Group
Discussion, question-and-answer, general social support, and journal processing for progress-oriented rape survivors. No crisis, no damaging or triggering conflicts--this is for individuals who want to contribute to collective, cooperative action toward the goal of making actual PROGRESS through rape trauma. Much of this work is based on the book "Resurrection After...
EmpoweredOKC
In order to build a culture that integrates equal rights and dignity into all aspects of life, we must take these steps:
We must defend the defenders. When someone speaks out, when activists act, when a victim comes forward to name her perpetrator, we must see their well-being as a personal concern of ours. When media pundits mock activists against violence, we must see that mockery as a choice to support a system of violence, and speak back to defend the defenders and challenge the critics. When anti-violence activists are mocked as "feminazis" or "sissies" or "dykes", we must make our solidarity with them known. Perhaps only a few members of our society have the courage and opportunity to become public figures in the resistance to violence and abuse, but the rest of us can support them. This may also mean that when a loved one volunteers their time for positive social action, we should support themâemotionally, financially, and vocally.
We must stop the cycle of violence. This means learning non-violent parenting techniques so that patterns of aggression are not promoted to future generations. It means confronting the use of violence as media entertainment, without regard for the likelihood that we will be teased as too-sensitive complainers. For men, it means telling our sons and daughters that certain entertainment is forbidden in the homeânot because mommy would object, but because we object, as men.
We must demand improved rights and laws. Our governments must be held to high standards of responsiveness to victim's rights. Unfortunately, many governments believe that the way to appear responsive to victims is to become increasingly harsh on perpetrators, often pitting candidates in a race to appear the most punitive on behalf of victims. But that is not the answer, because it omits the real needs of victims. Government is not responding to victims needs by raising the stakes of punishment while simultaneously cutting support for such resources as women's shelters, rape crisis programs, sexual assault forensic investigative programs, violence prevention education, youth mentoring, community counseling for trauma survivors, rural crisis support services, improved law enforcement and judicial trainings, and batterer treatment programs.
We must secure the rights of the underrepresented. There is a myth that violence and abuse are more common among poor families. In fact, violence and abuse are often the factors that cause poverty, not vice-versa. The number one source of new applications for government assistance programs are women and children fleeing domestic abuse (and the number one cause of new homeless are also women and children fleeing domestic abuse!), and women are disproportionately targeted by violence. Our society wraps itself in noise about how precious children are, but services for children are typically the first to be cut. Pregnant women are three times more likely to be victimized by violent male partners, and violence is the number one cause of injury to women in America. Native American women are particularly victimized at rates three to four times higher than any other group in the United States. It would be a mistake to abandon these issues to government alone to respond to, but few other organizationsâincluding religiousâhave even attempted to respond. It is an audacious thing to claim that all of us really were created uniquely but equally. Securing rights for the underserved may mean supporting groups like Amnesty International, PFLAG, RAINN, Habitat for Humanity, and others.
We must educate for an active citizenry. Without accurate and well-accomplished education efforts, most peoples' understanding of issues like domestic and sexual violence, neglect, and other trauma come from media fiction. Song lyrics, videos, TV reality shows, and movies offer a sensationalized and inaccurate depiction of the cycles of violence, often fostering victim-blaming attitudes in the process. When I worked as a violence prevention educator, some schools declined offers for free dating violence prevention programs for students on the grounds that "our students don't have an issue with that." Time after time, this was found to be false when students from those same schools later became therapy clients of mine. Religious groups, schools colleges, and civic organizations need to reach out to crisis service agencies and request speakers, and should reciprocate by supporting those agencies' projects and conferences. Books about trauma should be found on the shelves of every ministry, and clergy should seek special training.
Spiritual activism is a healthy, empowering assault on the cage bars of our abused minds, a tearing down of the walls of the empire of abuse that has sprung up in the world. But it is more than just a tearing down of something awful, it is also the construction of hope, of alternative ways of seeing, in a world where hope itself is an act of rebellion against abuse. The poet Rainer Maria Wilke once challenged,
"Some special people wake up. They have no ground in the crowd. They move on to broader laws. They carry strange customs with them and demand room for bold and audacious actions. The future speaks ruthlessly through them. They change the world."
We must defend the defenders. When someone speaks out, when activists act, when a victim comes forward to name her perpetrator, we must see their well-being as a personal concern of ours. When media pundits mock activists against violence, we must see that mockery as a choice to support a system of violence, and speak back to defend the defenders and challenge the critics. When anti-violence activists are mocked as "feminazis" or "sissies" or "dykes", we must make our solidarity with them known. Perhaps only a few members of our society have the courage and opportunity to become public figures in the resistance to violence and abuse, but the rest of us can support them. This may also mean that when a loved one volunteers their time for positive social action, we should support themâemotionally, financially, and vocally.
We must stop the cycle of violence. This means learning non-violent parenting techniques so that patterns of aggression are not promoted to future generations. It means confronting the use of violence as media entertainment, without regard for the likelihood that we will be teased as too-sensitive complainers. For men, it means telling our sons and daughters that certain entertainment is forbidden in the homeânot because mommy would object, but because we object, as men.
We must demand improved rights and laws. Our governments must be held to high standards of responsiveness to victim's rights. Unfortunately, many governments believe that the way to appear responsive to victims is to become increasingly harsh on perpetrators, often pitting candidates in a race to appear the most punitive on behalf of victims. But that is not the answer, because it omits the real needs of victims. Government is not responding to victims needs by raising the stakes of punishment while simultaneously cutting support for such resources as women's shelters, rape crisis programs, sexual assault forensic investigative programs, violence prevention education, youth mentoring, community counseling for trauma survivors, rural crisis support services, improved law enforcement and judicial trainings, and batterer treatment programs.
We must secure the rights of the underrepresented. There is a myth that violence and abuse are more common among poor families. In fact, violence and abuse are often the factors that cause poverty, not vice-versa. The number one source of new applications for government assistance programs are women and children fleeing domestic abuse (and the number one cause of new homeless are also women and children fleeing domestic abuse!), and women are disproportionately targeted by violence. Our society wraps itself in noise about how precious children are, but services for children are typically the first to be cut. Pregnant women are three times more likely to be victimized by violent male partners, and violence is the number one cause of injury to women in America. Native American women are particularly victimized at rates three to four times higher than any other group in the United States. It would be a mistake to abandon these issues to government alone to respond to, but few other organizationsâincluding religiousâhave even attempted to respond. It is an audacious thing to claim that all of us really were created uniquely but equally. Securing rights for the underserved may mean supporting groups like Amnesty International, PFLAG, RAINN, Habitat for Humanity, and others.
We must educate for an active citizenry. Without accurate and well-accomplished education efforts, most peoples' understanding of issues like domestic and sexual violence, neglect, and other trauma come from media fiction. Song lyrics, videos, TV reality shows, and movies offer a sensationalized and inaccurate depiction of the cycles of violence, often fostering victim-blaming attitudes in the process. When I worked as a violence prevention educator, some schools declined offers for free dating violence prevention programs for students on the grounds that "our students don't have an issue with that." Time after time, this was found to be false when students from those same schools later became therapy clients of mine. Religious groups, schools colleges, and civic organizations need to reach out to crisis service agencies and request speakers, and should reciprocate by supporting those agencies' projects and conferences. Books about trauma should be found on the shelves of every ministry, and clergy should seek special training.
Spiritual activism is a healthy, empowering assault on the cage bars of our abused minds, a tearing down of the walls of the empire of abuse that has sprung up in the world. But it is more than just a tearing down of something awful, it is also the construction of hope, of alternative ways of seeing, in a world where hope itself is an act of rebellion against abuse. The poet Rainer Maria Wilke once challenged,
"Some special people wake up. They have no ground in the crowd. They move on to broader laws. They carry strange customs with them and demand room for bold and audacious actions. The future speaks ruthlessly through them. They change the world."
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