Rebuilding Marriage After Infidelity Community Group

A community for those who have been through the heartbreak of infidelity and decided to stay with their partner and try to re-build the relationship.

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lovingagain 10/26/2009

So, I wasn't feeling good this weekend. Sinus headache, vertigo, peri-menopause crap. Yesterday was a typical Sunday, laid back morning, H goes off to the gym at 3, I get some kitchen stuff done. I made a simple supper and he brought some wine home for me.

After supper, I became "crazy wife". I told him I was feeling neglected (which I was, but not in a huge way). Ranted and raved that I didn't trust him. Said awful things.

All with NO reason. He's been busy, but has done NOTHING to earn my craziness. Sometimes I feel just nuts, like I've lost all reason.

I think I can blame most of it on my hormones being all over the place, but geez. I feel like a fool. And I HATE the fact that that stupid affair lurks in my mind, regardless of what is actually happening in our lives. 2 years past Dday, and it still lurks.

I HATE it!!!!!!!!!!

deleted_user 10/26/2009

Loving, wrap your arms around yourself from ALL of us for a big ((((hug)))) and remind yourself that you are human. You are always here when we have bad days and as much as I hate to admit it, I know I will have lots more days like that too. We have suffered a severe trauma and even though we get better at coping, we never forget. If it's any consolation, I hate it too:(

deleted_user 10/26/2009

I am only 8 months into this. I hate that I think about it everyday. I hate the fact that it has changed me as a person. I hate the way I now look at other people. I hate that I dont think I will ever completely trust anyone again.

lovingagain 10/26/2009

Thanks all. Pressing on here. I had a totally slothful day, did nothing. But I'm feeling better.

Hubby went to his mom's for dinner, so I didn't have to cook. I cleaned up a little, and am headed off for a nice hit shower.

Life goes on.

lovingagain 10/26/2009

Geez, make that "hot shower", not "hit".

deleted_user 10/26/2009

I have become a different person. He told me the other day I have become such a negative person. I agree with him I use to see the good in everything no I just have days where I feel so lost. I find myself always finding the negative in all parts of my life.

deleted_user 10/27/2009

loving I know how the hormornes during menopause come and go. One day your fine and then all of a sudden something gets into your head and you just can't seem to let it go, it just hangs there and your not exactly sure how it even got there.

I went through menopause early in life and I couldn't believe how it affected me. Emotional fits of crying, anger, and for some reason the lack of ability to let the little things go. Instead I dwelled on them. Finally went and got a anti depressant and I have to say the dwelling on things stopped.

I'm glad I went through this before I found out about the A. If I had found out while going through this phase in my life I think I would have nagged him out of the house or possibly even physicaly attacked him in some way.

Don't feel like a fool. These hormone attacks come out of no where at no given time or place. It's bad enough we have to learn to deal with this physical thing happening to our bodies and then add an A to it is just to mind blowing to the brain.

lovingagain 10/27/2009

I've been going through peri-menopause for 9 years! I can't take ERT...my one attempt resulted in blood clots in my foot and leg. So basically, I just have to deal with it.

My doctor assures me that it's not abnormal for it to last so long. Easy for him to say, he doesn't have to deal with it.

deleted_user 10/27/2009

It's been six years for me and still have problems. Hot flashes have lessened but still find me from time to time. I chose not to go on any hormonal replacement therapy since so much negative has been exposed. Running the course day to day. Sucks to be a woman during these times!! lol

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