Rebuilding Marriage After Infidelity Community Group
A community for those who have been through the heartbreak of infidelity and decided to stay with their partner and try to re-build the relationship.
Has anyone experienced chnaging feelings as you attempt to work to repair your marriage? I don't know if I'm going thru one of the many stages or what is happening to me. Recently I have been looking at my husband and he is just not caring about himself( his appearence ) kinda has a bad attitude not caring about other people. He is trying to make our marriage work and cgoing to counseling and showing me in his own way that he does love me. I want to be intimate with him more but he is not able to obtain and seems to have some ED.( he doesn't think it is a problem since he has just had two past back surgeries in the past 6 months)
I am just having some change in my feelings. I think that I might be losing the love that I had for him and I am feeling sad that this is happening. It's weird when I first found out about the EA I thought that I could not live with out him and now I am seeing myself looking ahead and wanting better for myself and our daughter.The problem is that our life is so convenient , we are very active with freinds and family that we are always doing things. It would be weird not being at these events with out him. I ask myself , am I happy? I can say right now I'm not really sure that I am , it all just feels convenient. Anyone else have this problem or suggestions?
I am just having some change in my feelings. I think that I might be losing the love that I had for him and I am feeling sad that this is happening. It's weird when I first found out about the EA I thought that I could not live with out him and now I am seeing myself looking ahead and wanting better for myself and our daughter.The problem is that our life is so convenient , we are very active with freinds and family that we are always doing things. It would be weird not being at these events with out him. I ask myself , am I happy? I can say right now I'm not really sure that I am , it all just feels convenient. Anyone else have this problem or suggestions?
If you're anything like me- I first went through devastation, then wanted to cling and fix, almost desperately. Then, another phase- where I think I toughened up and starting feeling stronger- knowing I could do it on my own if I had to. I think I hung on the fence for a little while, weighing the odds. Looking back, I suppose I was distancing myself from the reality of it all, trying to figure out the solution for myself.
It may be that you are going through such a phase now, where you're going through the motions, and trying to justify to yourself if your commitment is to keep struggling to fight for it. Maybe you're on that fence?
I remember feeling like i was falling out of love with my husband, but I think it was more of finding out the real person I fell in love with. I saw him one way when we married, but after we married and the crap hit the fan I really found out who I married. I still love him, but I have changed. I really do believe me changing was a good thing. I don't like what happened, but I am glad that I have allowed myself to heal a little bit and laugh again. Its crazy how much a person can change and how much stronger we can be. HUGS!