Hi Paul, this thread is pretty dead, and I've found it's mostly populated by those with spouses who are PA. You probably won't find others like yourself who are working to overcome their own PA. Good luck to you. Because the origins of PA tend to run deeply, all the way back to our childhood and how we first learn to deal with others, I hope you have counseling to support you on your journey.

Paul -

It's going to take consistent effort over a long period of time to decrease pa behaviors. From what I've seen, you can improve and than regress. If you are willing to open up and trust people for feedback (wife, therapist combination is probably best,) it will help you learn what the behaviors you are doing that are passive aggressive and develop self awareness.

It's the lack of self awareness and ability to acknowledge your own emotions that trips up passive aggressives. Without these things, you can't make lasting improvement.

I wish you luck.

I applaud your efforts to seek a better way to just be. Praying it works for you. Everyone needs kudos when kudos are due.