I understand your difficulty. One concern I have is that this will not be the first or last child assaulted/raped by this guy. Do you have the strength to protect other kids in the future from this guy? If you have a sexual assault centre in your area you should be able to phone anonymously and ask them questions. They will know the legal side of this situation. Bottom line is this guy needs to be stopped. I am not sure I would have the stength at this time to do that. That is very hard to take on right now. I am glad you are a caring person and good luck.

He needs to be stopped!! This must be reported because he's going to end up hurting more people.

Hey honey, they are right this guy needs to be stopped and if there are two people both accussing him then that makes it that much easier. It helps the "ex"'s sound honest rather than revenge. I want you to call social services! This little boy may not have been awake but I garentee he will grow up and one day have major issues and have no idea why. There are so many people on DS who didn't know they were abused until it all came back to them at an older age and they are way worse than those who remembered it because they can not figure out if what they are remembering is true or something they are making up in their head. You just have to trust that YOU are doing what is right for this little boy and all the children around this guy. If he does this then TRUST me he will move onto bigger abuse and it will get worse and worse with each child he hurts. You can do this and we are here to help you along the way! I am proud of you!!!!

Just an update on this whole deal...The guy responsible for this will at this point walk away and it will be like it never happened. He admitted to it and a few other occasions to a friend but denied it all to the police of course. So yeah we can all know that there is "not enough" to charge him. Whatever, it is just frustrating to know that people like this are walking around living their lives as they wish when they do not deserve to be walking this earth at all, I understand that every abuser is someones family member or friend but these people need to be stopped to protect our children. I am so frustrated with this whole deal I appologize for ranting I just don't know where else to turn..

Did they file a report for both of these children. If there is anyone out there whose children he has done this to and they file a report then pretty soon there will be so many reports that they will have to start looking into it. Too bad someone doesn't have a camera set up to catch him on tape. I would warn anyone who this guy knows. There were times that i decided if my father in law gets out or never had to go to jail that i was going to post a HUGE sign in his yard saying "I sexually abuse little children" for all the neighbors to know! That is what i am so afraid of with these two boys that I just called on, that there won't be enough eveidence. We got lucky because my father in law confessed to anyone who asked. He didn't see that it was so bad (messed up in the head!) so he didn't have a problem telling people because he thought they would understand that he really didn't do anything wrong. He is finding out that no one else sees it his way and that maybe he is the one who doesn't understand. Pray, pray, pray! Tell anyone who suspects to follow up and look into it. Document, document, document, even if you just suspect then document why you suspect and date it. If a child tells you something then write it exactly as the child says. Maybe she should ask the child. I know she said that he was asleep and didn't know but kids don't like what is happening and will pretend to be asleep. Even if he really was asleep she needs to have the talk that no one is allowed to touch you there and if they do to tell her. Never give up, sometimes we have to back down a bit but never ever walk away, just wait until the time is right and one day it will be!

ok so last night my daughter broke down and informed me that this same person had done some things to her, it wasn't as bad as she has been through before but she is older now and felt very violated. I don't know that I want to put her through the reporting process again I think it would be to much for her to go through now... I just don't know, everyone is trying to get me to reconsider not reporting it but I fear for my daughters well being... GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! Why do people do this stuff? What is it about our innocent children that is so appealing to these perverts?!?!?

Honey let me be the first to tell you. I have talked to so many people whose parents didn't report it and they grew up resenting them for it because to them it showed that you didn't care enough to do something. I know some of the parents were trying to keep their child from having to live through the court process and stuff and some just didn't want their own name to be smeered but these children were very hurt by this. I know of one lady whose parents went and talked to the guy and told him he is never allowed around their children again and they said that they felt it was handled very well. The girl grew into adult hood and was very screwed up. She said that she aways felt like no one stood up for her. I personally think your daughter told you because she wants you to do something, it is a cry for help. If she didn't want to have to go through it all again then she would have kept it to herself and not let anyone know. She told you because she knows that you can help her and believes that you will help her. Talk to her about it, she can tell you and above all this is one more accusation against this guy, sooner or later something will give. They may not even do anything about your daughters case against him and she will be spared but the next time he is reported she would have helped build a case against him. You always have to do what is right, not what is easiest because in the end doing what is right is what will prove to have the best overall outcome for everyone, including your daughter. My kids didn't want anyone to know and we told anyway and now they are so thankful that we did rather than keeping their secret. Keep your head up high and I know that you will make the right choice! God put you in this position because you are strong and can make things happen!

Also remember that children are hard to break!!!! They bounce back so easily and this would actually be easier for her because she does remember unlike when she was too young to tell. When something happens and you and I as adults look at it and say "I can't do it again" children, they can, they more like rubber and we are more like glass. Any one of us with children who have gone through all this, social services, telling their secret and everything involved, know that through out it all, our children were stronger than we were! She'll be okay because she has such an amazing Mom!