Parents of abused children Community Group
This group is for any parent of a child who has been abused so they may find comfort as well as advice and answers to their many thoughts and feelings.
I am dealing with my son who abused my daughter. This role is a horrible. I am right now feeling guilty for not protecting my son's right more but I didn't want to minimize what he did either. I am trying to do everything right but I feel incompetent. I should have got my son representation for him while he was questioned by police but I was taken into a room to deal with the crisis social worker. I am currently living with my best friends family with my daughter while my husband is staying at our home with our son. I know that this doesn't seem fair for our daughter but unfortunately he had no where to go. All of our friends and family have children and we don't want to put him in a situation that could be risky for him or others. I am very overwhelmed and miss my family and especially my husband. We have both kids now in counseling and are trying to find out if we can have my son's charges lowered. I really believe his intent didn't match the laws requirements for 1st degree sexual assault. My son just turned 12 in august my daughter is 4 1/2 and this happened about 3 weeks ago. I am feeling hopeless right now.
Bandmom5
MaraD, I'm so sorry for what you and your family are going thru; you must feel so torn and overwhelmed in addition to the pain and guilt. I just joined this site a few days ago in another group (parents whose children have been sexually abused), and just came across this group today. I just wanted to respond to you--I see it's been over 3 weeks since you posted and I want to let you know you're not alone and doing the best things you can for now. Keeping your daughter safe and loved and letting her you believe her and it's not your fault is your first priority, which you're doing. I know it's a natural response to feel guilty, but it's not your fault. One thing I'm surprised about is I didn't know the police could question your son who's a minor without you or your husband present--you may want to check on that. I hope you're all getting counseling to help you deal with this; if not, please try and do that--it will help you handle all you'll be going thru. Your son needs alot of help too--I don't want to throw more on your plate, but has this possibly been done to him? It's sometimes where young offenders learn the behavior. It's hard to see now, and there is a long road ahead for you, but things will get better--you have to take things one step at a time. I have you all in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong. ((hugs))
Bandmom5
Oops..Sorry for the spelling mistakes...I meant "keeping your daughter safe and loved and 'telling' her you believe her and it's not 'her' fault..." My mind goes faster than I can type and I get lost.
deleted_user
I commend you for facing this nightmare and not sweeping it under the rug. You are saving his life by teaching him that this is not acceptable. Show him love although I am sure you are shattered. You are A GREAT MOTHER.
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