Newbies Quitting Smoking Community Group
As floundering "newbies" trying to kick this habit of smoking, I hope this site will offer more support than those that simply tout their numbers and days of quit, without offering much support and/or sharing what the emotional realm of quitting entails in the early days of quit. Let's vent, rant and rave . . . and hopefully as a collective "group" we can nix the...
First of all . . a little background information about "me" for the newbies. I've been smoking like a fiend for 35 years. Over the years, there were times that I really wanted to quit . . for various reasons, but the quit never stuck. I tried acupuncture, hypnotherapy, nico-gum & patches . . and my latest Alan Carr's book "Easy Way to Stop Smoking". I joined a support group (but didn't find other newbies there that could relate to my angst and emotions while trying to attempt quitting again. Thus this group was born in hopes of reaching out to other peeps that are wanting to quit smoking and need rock-solid support along with a listening ear for our respective struggles, rants and raves! It's not easy folks . . and those that say it is are probably those that were scared into quitting because of a medical issue. I simply don't want to get to the point that I have to quit because of emphysema, COPD, lung cancer. I don't want to be dragging an oxygen tank around in my 60's, 70's or 80's (if I were to live that long). I want to be free from the evil addiction, I really do!!
However, I have attempted the quit four times now in the past six months. My first attempt came via a medical scare due to a leg break. Post surgery, 8 months later . . my bones were not healing. I had been warned by the doc that if I continued to smoke, I would most likely have to have another surgery which involved taking bone marrow from my hip and injecting into my tib/fib. Ouch! Not wanting that, I decided it was time to quit. I quit for 22 days. After going back to see my Ortho . . my leg was on a serious mend! Miracle of miracles! Shortly after, an emotional trigger event happened and I went right back to smoking. I felt horrible about it, but took it for granted that I could quit again at anytime. NOT. Three months went by, then decided I needed to quit. I quit for three days. Another ten days of smoking. Then I quit for nine days. A week of smoking, then my next and latest attempt . . I slipped on day four.
I'm left feeling frustrated at my apparent lack of weakness (which I'm learning is not a weakness, yet feels that way). I'm emotional all the time, whether I'm smoking or not. I have this love/hate thing going on with the addiction. Any yes, I am quite certain it is an addiction and not just a habit! It's an awful insidious addiction and one that I truly want to get rid of.
I think part of my problem was in believing that others' could/would help me through this. (I still believe in support) . . but I wasn't finding said support. I would rant and rave and scream for help . . but was simply being told over and over that I just needed to buck up, that this was "my" quit and a personal journey. Well, hog wash. I think we all need support when we are quitting!! I know that I personally need to know that others are experiencing the same case of crazies! I need to hear from those that quit that they too experienced a similar journey. (We have two members here thus far with a lot of years under their belt, ready to help us!)
I'm not sure when I'll plan my next quit . . but what I will do is "listen" and "learn" all I can about the quit. I will not give up on the quit plan. I will keep trying! I know one day it will "stick".
However, I have attempted the quit four times now in the past six months. My first attempt came via a medical scare due to a leg break. Post surgery, 8 months later . . my bones were not healing. I had been warned by the doc that if I continued to smoke, I would most likely have to have another surgery which involved taking bone marrow from my hip and injecting into my tib/fib. Ouch! Not wanting that, I decided it was time to quit. I quit for 22 days. After going back to see my Ortho . . my leg was on a serious mend! Miracle of miracles! Shortly after, an emotional trigger event happened and I went right back to smoking. I felt horrible about it, but took it for granted that I could quit again at anytime. NOT. Three months went by, then decided I needed to quit. I quit for three days. Another ten days of smoking. Then I quit for nine days. A week of smoking, then my next and latest attempt . . I slipped on day four.
I'm left feeling frustrated at my apparent lack of weakness (which I'm learning is not a weakness, yet feels that way). I'm emotional all the time, whether I'm smoking or not. I have this love/hate thing going on with the addiction. Any yes, I am quite certain it is an addiction and not just a habit! It's an awful insidious addiction and one that I truly want to get rid of.
I think part of my problem was in believing that others' could/would help me through this. (I still believe in support) . . but I wasn't finding said support. I would rant and rave and scream for help . . but was simply being told over and over that I just needed to buck up, that this was "my" quit and a personal journey. Well, hog wash. I think we all need support when we are quitting!! I know that I personally need to know that others are experiencing the same case of crazies! I need to hear from those that quit that they too experienced a similar journey. (We have two members here thus far with a lot of years under their belt, ready to help us!)
I'm not sure when I'll plan my next quit . . but what I will do is "listen" and "learn" all I can about the quit. I will not give up on the quit plan. I will keep trying! I know one day it will "stick".
MayberryDeb
Good for you that you will keep trying. Never quit trying to quit. Yes, I went thru the same thing as you. I think ALL of us did. Quitting ain't for sissies. This is a journey with many bumps in the road. It is also a process that doesn't happen overnight. There are no 'easy fixes' no magic pill' . This hard work to kick this addiction. I tried many times but what really worked for me was the 'other' group and Chantix. Many people can't take it, I am so glad I was able to.
dschwartz
So much of what you wrote is what we also write about on our grief journey as widow/widowers! Really. The grief journey isn't easy, bumps in the road, a process, no magic elixers or quick fixes, etc etc. The parallel is amazing as I do feel "grief" over the quit. Bizarre.
LankyYankee
There absolutely is a grieving process when you quit. You have to rethink your relationship with the nicodemon. You thought of him/her as a friend only to discover that this monster is no friend because friends don't want to make you sick, impede healing processes, don't want to kill you. It's a lot to absorb in early quit days. Healing begins as soon as you stop smoking but it takes some time to wrap your mind around living as a nonsmoker. This will happen for you and it really will get easier but the early days and weeks can be a beeeeeaaach. Reach out, scream, vent, cry, laugh, it's all part of the process. How are you quitting? I mean patch, gum, lozenges, Chantix, cold turkey? I had a prescription for Chantix but at the time my insurance company did not cover the cost and it was expensive, like almost $200.00 a month so I hung that prescription on my fridge, called it Plan B and opted for cold turkey. It worked for me but I was really ready to quit. I burned that prescription 6 months later. Here's something that I did and it helped me. I wrote a goodbye letter to the nicodemon, it really helped with the mindset that I was done, that I was "breaking up" with this nasty monster. I also envisioned this demon that once seemed to loom larger than life as a puny little fly that I could swat away. You will get this, you will beat this addiction, you are so worth the effort it takes to put your smoking days behind you.
dschwartz
I guess cold turkey? I've tried pretty much everything other than Chantix and Vaping. Not doing the Vape, not an option. As for Chantix . . it scares me (possible side effects). I'm already on a anti-anxiety . . I don't think I want to add another script. Patches and gum only gave me the weebie jeebies. YAK Acupuncture didn't work, hypnotherapy didn't work, Alan Carr's book didn't work for long. I think I simply need to educate up a little better and now that I've got some good support surrounding me (thank you Cheryl and Deb) . . hopefully my next quit will stick. I think I read somewhere to prepare for a month, like really prepare. Maybe I was quasi-preparing before? I've learned a lot through my attempts, but something was missing. Quite honestly, I think it was the support from those that have traveled this journey and made it to the other side. I kept reaching out on the other site and yes, I certainly had some support, but then I got some stupid tough love one-liner responses that just made me feel worse!! Not playing the blame game, just analyzing what is going on w/ my quit.
LankyYankee
Here's something that may help. Write down the reasons you want to quit. Print off a bunch of copies. Put the copies where you will see them, like dresser mirror, bathroom mirror, inside your cupboard where you keep your coffee cups, windshield visor, on your fridge, places where you smoke. The idea is that you will constantly be reminding yourself why you want to quit and it may just keep you from lighting up so often. Try to change up your routines that trigger the urge to smoke. Sometimes it's as simple and going into a different room. If you puff with that AM cuppa joe try taking a walk instead. Quitting involves doing a lot of soul searching and being able to identify triggers. You will know when you're ready.
dschwartz
Great advice!! Recently I was switching up routine(s), etc. I just get so "manic" around day 3-4 . . . I'm like the energizer bunny on steroids. A lot gets done for sure, but it's not an enjoyable manic/accomplishment. It's like my nerves are simply jumping all over the place and my brain is on dis-connect. Not sure how to describe it. Maybe like I'm "running" from the devil? Run, run, run . . go, go, go . . . but I can't seem to outlast the nico-demon race. Okay, here I go in tears again. This just sucks!
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